Fanfic - Crossover Stories
"Oh My God, Max Healed Kenny!"
Part 5
by Chris Baker
Disclaimer: I do not own the characters--I am only borrowing them. Roswell characters are the intellectual property of Melinda Metz and Jason Katims Productions. South Park characters are the intellectual property of Trey Parker and Matt Stone. However, this can be considered a parody; and the Supreme Court has ruled that parodies do not constitute plagiarism.
Summary: Things in Roswell get a little weirder when the boys from South Park pay a visit.
Category: Crossover Stories
Rating: PG-13
Author's Note: This story takes place after the last episode of Roswell's first season. I have given Kenny an audible speaking part. This is the only fanfic I have seen which includes Milton, the owner of the UFO center Copyright 2000, 2001 Christopher Baker
Kyle Valenti drove a little faster than the others. He and Tess arrived at the camp first. He had only let go of her hand when he had to shift gears.

"Here we are," he said and stopped the car.

"I am going to make it up to you," she again promised and got out of the car. "Let's go swim."

"Shouldn't we unload the car first?" Kyle wondered and also got out.

"It's really hot. Plus, I am leaving my swimsuit in your trunk anyway. That's my way of making it up to you."

"Okay." Kyle was flattered, but was also starting to wish that Tess was more like Liz.

Tess was out of her clothes in about fifteen seconds, as if she had planned for this. Kyle took about a minute. The temperature was about ninety degrees already.

"Let's go," she commanded.

"I'll race you," he challenged.

Kyle ran a little faster than Tess. He did a racing dive into the lake. Tess stepped in feet first. The water was about four feet deep. Both let themselves down so only their heads and shoulders were exposed.

"I could have used my powers to stop you if I had wanted," told Tess, as she made the water rise and smack Kyle in the face.

"I'll get you for that," responded Kyle, who went underwater, grabbed her feet, and flipped her over.

Tess came up and looked at him closely.

"I have something to tell you," she said.

"What?" Kyle wondered.

"I don't know how to swim," Tess declared. "I was hoping to learn this weekend."

"I would love to show you how. You certainly don't seem to be afraid of the water. I also you know you learn fast."

"Let's go further out."

"Okay. I used to swim the individual medley. That's all four strokes in one event. In about an hour, you'll be able to do them all, too."

Tess moved to the middle of the lake, about twenty feet from the edge. It was just deep enough to come up to her shoulders. Kyle followed, and she kissed him on the cheek.

Max pulled the jeep up by Kyle's car. They saw the kiss and the clothing by his car. They started to watch them, just to see make sure if what they saw was really happening.

"I think Tess and Kyle are getting along well," Isabel commented.

"He's definitely keeping her company," added Liz, who was a little angry that Kyle and Tess already seemed to be doing more than she and Max were.

"I certainly don't have a problem with this," Alex smiled and continued watching them.

Michael and Maria had arrived right after them. They approached the jeep and also saw the clothing on the ground.

"That girl has no morals," Maria criticized. "Doesn't she have any self-respect?"

"We wouldn't have saved Max's life without her," Michael defended. "Let's give her benefit of the doubt."

"How do you feel about this, Max?" Liz wondered.

"I'm happy for them if they are happy," Max answered. "They seem pretty happy to me. You wanted this to happen--didn't you, Liz?"

"Well, I think it's good that Tess is no longer casting spells on you, Max," Maria stated. "But what has she done to Kyle? She needs to stop doing this to men. First, it's you. Now, it's Kyle.

"How do you know that this isn't just some vision she's creating?" Maria wondered. "Maybe she just wants us to think they're skinny dipping. How do we know that Kyle's car is really here? How do we know that we are really here?"

"Those are good questions, Maria," Alex said with sarcasm. "How do we know that we even exist? It could be just some vision that Tess has conjured up. Our existence is an illusion manufactured by Tess Harding."

"How can we think if we don't exist?" Max inquired.

"It's not nice to make fun of Maria, Alex," Isabel smiled and kissed him on the cheek.

"You should listen to Isabel, Alex, without filters," Liz advised.

Liz was getting tense. She was hoping someone else would join Tess and Kyle. She wanted to do it, but didn't want to be the first of the other six. There was about fifteen seconds of silence. It was like everyone wanted to jump in, but nobody wanted to seem too eager to jump in.

"Come on, Maria," Michael ordered.

"What do you mean, Michael?" Maria wondered. "I didn't know you told me what to do."

"You've said that you want us to act like a 'real couple,'" Michael remembered. "Let's go for a swim. This is something that a 'real couple' would do."

"If you want me to do this, you don't just order me to do it, Michael. This is not the time of the cavemen. Act like a civilized human being."

Michael fell to one knee and kissed Maria's right hand. He took it and held it.

"Maria, would you accompany me in the lake for a swim without any swimsuits?" he asked.

"That's better," answered Maria, pulling him back up to his feet. "Let's go."

Maria and Michael stripped in about half a minute. They ran into the lake. They kissed briefly in the water.

Liz was smiling brighter now. She knew that Isabel would be the last to go in, so she and Max had to be next. She was appreciative for Michael taking the initiative.

"That was the romantic thing you have ever done," Maria complimented when they were in the water together. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Michael responded.

Isabel was becoming quite tense. She feared intimacy the most of all. She and Alex had kissed and held each other, but that was it. Max hadn't even see her naked in three years.

"Look at this," Isabel worried. "This had to be Tess's idea. Look at what she's doing to us. This is probably just some illusion. She's probably laughing her head off at us."

"Does she have the power to do this to all of us at once?" Max inquired.

"I thought she could only do it to one person at a time."

"That's just what she has told us, Max," Isabel answered. "Why did you invite her?"

"Kyle invited her," Liz answered. "We're all his guests. I'm glad he's keeping her company."

"If she's happy, then I'm happy for her," Max added. "She's loosening up and having some fun."

Liz kissed Max on his lips gently. She held onto him afterward.

"We can have fun, too, Max," Liz suggested.

"Let's go," Max agreed.

Max and Liz took their clothes off and jumped into the water.

Alex began to scratch Isabel's back gently.

"What are you doing?" Isabel wondered defensively.

"I just thought you could use a back rub now," Alex answered. "You usually enjoy them. I didn't realize that I needed to ask permission. I haven't in the past."

"I'm sorry," Isabel apologized. "You are good to me. Do you want to jump in with them?"

"Only if you want to."

"I want to."

"Let's go."

Isabel and Alex disrobed and jumped in the water together.

"You're good to me even when I am acting like a bitch," Isabel thanked him. "You never take it seriously. I am so happy that you see beyond all my shields."

Kyle stopped the swim lesson for a moment. "Look what we have done," he said. "We even got the ice queen to come skinny dipping with us."

"It's not nice to call your guests names, Kyle," Tess reminded. "You are talking about Isabel--aren't you?"

"She's a popular girl," Kyle commented. "Some guys who have went out with her say she just doesn't want to do anything more than go out. Now that I know what she is, I understand why she has been so reserved with those guys. She had good reasons not to trust them."

"Trust hasn't always been easy for me either. It amazes me that Max has embraced Liz the way he has. I'm not sure if I'll ever be able to do that."

"I'm willing to wait for that. I think you'll be worth it. Liz was right about people who are not of this earth. She said that when they have your heart, you don't stand a chance. I know that I don't."

Tess reached behind Kyle's head and pulled him toward her. Kyle knew what was happening and reached around her shoulder. She rested her other hand on his chest. Kyle ran his other hand through her hair.

Her eyes closed, and her mouth opened to meet his. Kyle locked his mouth on hers and took her breath into his. He loved the feel of this intelligent, fun-loving girl in his arms. He was also getting a vision. He knew about her powers, and he simply enjoyed the moment. It was the most intimate kiss he had ever shared.

This was only the second kiss for Tess. But this was nothing compared to Max's. She didn't have this kiss because she had played mind games with Kyle. She had earned this one. She let Kyle's tongue enter her mouth and explore it. She was going to let him take as long as he wanted. She also saw a vision.

"I should have told you about this," Tess apologized after it was over. "We have visions when we kiss. We connect with people."

"I enjoyed it," Kyle smiled. "It was very special."

"What did you see?" Tess wondered.

"I saw some guilt and regret for what you have done in the past. I saw your loneliness, when you were left in the pods alone. I saw the time you were found after you came out of the pods. I see that you are happy because they may be forgiving you."

"I saw you when you found out your mother and father were separating. I saw how much it hurt you. I see that your mother doesn't have much contact with you. You miss her very much, and that's why your girl friends are so important to you."

"You're good."

"So are you."

Jimbo found out where the lake was and got directions. They found the teens' cars and decided to stake them out on the other side of the lake. The lake was about a hundred yards across at this point, so they didn't think they would be seen on the other side.

Jimbo parked the truck, and the boys exited immediately. Stan, Kyle Broflovski, and Kenny grabbed their binoculars immediately.

"Whoa, dude," Stan observed. "This is pretty cool."

"They're skinny dipping," Kyle stated. "I don't care if they're aliens or not. This is neat."

"Do you think they'll do more?" Kenny wondered.

Jimbo and Ned unloaded everything from the truck. He was looking to get some good footage for his nature show. Jimbo got the camcorder.

"Ned, where are the tapes?" he asked.

Ned looked around. He hadn't brought them.

"I don't see any," Ned answered.

"Dammit, Ned," Jimbo complained, "what good is a camcorder if we don't have any tapes? Our viewers want proof that there are aliens in Roswell. Now, we're out here in the middle of nowhere with no tapes."

"We'll just have to capture one of them," Ned suggested.

"Okay, we'll wait until tonight for that."

Jimbo and Ned got binoculars and joined the three boys. Only Cartman wasn't ready to accept this. He started to play his harmonica.

"This is a stakeout, Eric," Jimbo told. "We have to be quiet. They can't know that we're here."

"Nobody can block out that awful harmonica of yours," Stan commented.

"I think you boys just wanted to see some naked girls swimming," Jimbo claimed. "I guess there's nothing wrong with that. Even if we don't see aliens, it's not a complete loss."

"That's for sure," Kenny agreed.

They didn't take their eyes off them.

The gang swam in the lake until noon. Kyle got a beach ball, and they passed it around. Isabel and Alex went snorkeling. Kyle taught Tess everything he knew about swimming.

Isabel, Michael, Tess, and Max also used their powers openly. They all did little tricks with the water. Max created a fountain for Liz. Michael made it rain over Maria. Isabel tried to part the lake, but she wasn't that powerful. Tess continued to slap Kyle with the water, while Kyle splashed her in response. "This has been the time of my life," Michael said.

At about 12:30, two other South Park residents decided they would travel to the lake that night.

"We will move on them when they sleep," one of them declared.

Part 4 | Index | Part 6
Max/Liz | Michael/Maria | Alex/Isabel | UC Couples | Valenti | Other | Poetry | Crossovers | AfterHours
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