FanFic - Michael/Maria
"Drowning in the Might-Have-Been"
Part 1
by Spacie
Disclaimer: Sadly, no, I do not own Roswell, or Maria, or Michael. Or Courtney for that matter, if I owned Courtney I could tie her up and torture her ::big evil grin:: But no... Jason Katims owns them and he's keeping Courtney alive and Michael and Maria apart. Fine then. ::pouts:: The song is If You're Gone by Matchbox 20
Summary: Accompaniment piece to 'End of the World'. Michael is thinking about Maria being over him, and wondering if it hurts him more than he lets on.
Category: Michael/Maria
Rating: PG-13
Authors Note: Well, I LOVE Matchbox 20 and this is my favorite song by them. So, after Monday's ep I decided that I would never find a more perfect oppertunity!
I think I've already lost you
I think you're already gone.
I think I'm finally scared now

*BANG* *BANG* *BANG* Gloved hands pounded the swaying punching bag. *BANG* Trying to soak out anger through violence, that was always his way. When things didn't go the way he secretly wanted them, needed them, too... he acted out.

You think I'm weak - But I think you're wrong
I think you're already leaving
Feels like your hand is on the door
I thought this place was an empire
But now I'm relaxed - I can't be sure

Michael slipped the gloves off and threw them at the wall, letting the blue punching bag swing to a slow stop. The room was quiet, the quiet made him nervouse. It made him think of her. He couldn't think of her, she was gone. She left him now, finally she was over him. He wanted her to be over him, to move on. Work her magick on someone else, someone who wasn't him.

I think you're so mean - I think we should try
I think I could need - this in my life
I think I'm just scared - I think too much
I know this is wrong it's a problem I'm dealing

The gym was empty accept for him, and Michael felt it was time to go. He showered and quickly got dressed. Keeping his mind off of her, telling himself to keep his mind off of her. He shook his head and ran quietly out of the gym and on to his motorcycle. Trying to keep from imagining her tiny arms circled around his waist as she held on. He'd never felt her hang on to him like that, he wondered now if he ever would.

If you're gone - maybe it's time to go home
There's an awful lot of breathing room
But I can hardly move
If you're gone - baby you need to come home
Cuz there's a little bit of something me
In everything in you

Once he got to the apartment complex, Michael jumped off the bike and quickly locked himself in his apartment. The first thing he noticed was his busted T.V. That snake Courtney not only lost him a perfectly good T.V., but she lost him his heart. Because of Courtney, if that was even her real name, Maria had stopped loving him. She threatend him that she would, and she did. Michael blew up the remaining pieces of the T.V. for good measure.

I bet you're hard to get over
I bet the room just won't shine
I bet my hands I can stay here
I bet you need - more than you mind

Why did she have to fall for someone like him? Why couldn't his Maria fall for a decent guy. A guy like Alex or something. Someone who was devoted, and stable, and would risk his life for her. But no, she fell for him. Maria fell for Michael. And what was he doing thinking of her as his Maria, she wasn't his anymore. She wasn't anyone's.

I think you're so mean - I think we should try
I think I could need - this in my life
I think I'm just scared - that I know too much
I can't relate and that's a problem
I'm feeling

Deciding it was useless to not think of Maria, Michael decided to wallow in her memories, in their firey, passionate past. The very, very, VERY short lived past. But it was still fiey and passionate. Maybe, if Maria found out Courtney was a Skin, and that Michael had found her out, and that she had never meant anything to him... maybe she would take him back. Michael let himself think that for a moment before shaking the idea from his mind. No, Maria wouldn't take him back now, not now... not ever.

If you're gone - maybe it's time to go home
There's an awful lot of breathing room
But I can hardly move
If you're gone - baby you need to come home
cuz there's a little bit of something me
In everything in you

Laying his head on his pillow, and turning off the artificial light that was bathing the room, he tried to sleep. And sleep came, slowly, and restlessly. Filled with dreams of the past and the might have been's. But before sleep encompassed him, he wondered that if she did take him back, would he let himself be taken?

I think you're so mean - I think we should try
I think I could need - this in my life
I think I'm just scared - do I talk too much
I know it's wrong it's a problem I'm dealing

Index
Max/Liz | Michael/Maria | Alex/Isabel | UC Couples | Valenti | Other | Poetry | Crossovers | AfterHours
Crashdown is maintained by and . Design by Goldenboy.
Copyright © 1999-2004 Web Media Entertainment.
No infringement intended.