I see a flash of blond behind the counter and she looks up to see Max and Iz and I seated in her section. I see her walk over to Liz and gesture toward us. Liz shakes her head no, and Maria begins to plead with her. I wish I could hear what she was saying. Liz shakes her head no again, and Maria grabs her order pad and comes shuffling over to us, head down.

I anticipate a glib hello, maybe a sneer and a snide comment. I love to goad her; she's so pretty when her eyes flash in anger. Not that I'd ever admit that to anyone but myself. She reaches the end of the booth, nods her hello and asks simply, "What can I get you guys?"

I notice her eyes have never left her notepad. She won't look at us. No wait, she's looking at Izzy. Now at Max. It's just me she won't look at.

Isabel orders. "I'll have a plate of Saturn Rings and a Diet Coke." She smiles at Maria as she hands her the menu. Max is next. "Cherry coke and a piece of Men in Blackberry Pie. And Extra Tabasco, please?"

She nods her head, even gives him a little smile. My turn. She never looks up. Just waits. I lean down trying to catch her eye. It's no use. Aggravated, I decide to try to get under her skin.

"I'll have a UFO Burger, a Coke, and a pair of those antenna you're wearing. They're the newest accessory, aren't they?"

She looks up at me finally. "Coming right up," is all she says. No comment, no roll of the eyes. In fact, when she finally did look at me, her eyes looked dead. Like all the life had run out of her.

As she walks away, Isabel smacks my arm. "Why are you trying to annoy her?"

"Because it's what we do. Annoy each other for fun."

Max looked at me sadly. "I don't think she's having fun anymore Michael. I think you really hurt her."

I shake my head, trying to laugh it off, even though I can see it myself. She's been like a zombie for days, going through the motions. I watch her as she pours the drinks. She does each the exact same way. Grabs a glass, presses the button for ice, pulls the lever of the fountain, and places them on a tray. It's almost robotic. She grabs some straws and heads back over toward us.

Maria silently places the drinks in front of each of us, and as she's about to walk away, I try again. "Did you forget my antenna? I really was looking forward to making that fashion statement at school tomorrow."

She spins on her heel and looks me directly in the eye, her lips about to form a scathing remark. It's there on the tip of her tongue, and I wait for it's acid bite. She stops herself and lets it go without saying anything.

She walks away, looking so tired, so sick of it all. Isabel gives me a death glare. "Cut it out Michael. Why do you have to be so rude?" Max says nothing, just sips his Cherry coke.

They obviously don't get it. I was trying to make her mad, to snap her out of it. Because even though I'd never admit it, I miss her fighting and flirting with me. I want her back the way she was. It's like she's broken. Too hurt to function. And I know it's my fault.

I want her to fight back. To show that spark she used to have. It was my favorite thing about her, they way she always had a comeback. Her "don't mess with me" attitude. But now it's gone, and I took it away. I think it's the worst thing I've ever done. If it was someone else who did this to her, I would find them and beat the crap out of them. I guess I'll have to settle for beating myself up.

3 hours later, Max and Izzy have gone home, and I am still sitting in the booth, watching her, hoping for some sign of life. But she won't laugh with Jose, or chat with Liz. As she goes to walk out the door after her shift is over, her gaze falls on me. I catch her eye hoping for any sign that she's going to stand up for herself. But she just walks away. The fire is gone. The lost look in her eyes is almost too much to take. Too hurt, too sad to care anymore. She is wounded. And it's my fault. ~~~~~

Wounded - Third Eye Blind

The guy who put his hands on you
Has got nothing to do with me
And the bruises that you feel will heal
And I hope you come around again
Cause we're missing you
You used to speak so easy
Now you're afraid to talk to me
It's like walking with the wounded
Carrying that weight way too far
The concrete pulled you down so hard
Out there with the wounded
Missing you
Well I never claimed to understand what
happens after dark
But my fingers catch the sparks at the
thought of touching you
But you're wounded
Ahahahhh...

Let me break it down till I force the issue
We miss your face and you know I wish you
Would come back down to the Dalva Bar
You tell them, that's just my battle scar
I want to kiss you
And knock them down like we used to
Your the marigold

Till you're walking down shaking that ass again
And then you walk on baby walk on

You're an angel in the pit with her hands in the air
And we're missing you
Now it's fall, and your shoulders get tighter
Nervous flicks on the lighter, boots
Your pissed off poets, your women's groups
And the friends with you, we should have known this fool
Well I guess we missed the marks
Still my fingers catch the sparks at the thought of
Them touching you
Now you're wounded
Ahahahhhhh.......

Let me break it down till I force the issue
You never come around, and you know we miss you
Well nobody took your pride away
That's something people say
Back down the bully to the back of the bus
Cause it's time for them to be scared of us
Till you're yelling, how we living cause you got the ball
Then you rock on baby, rock on, you rock on On and on
You're a summer time hottie with her socks in the air
Screaming I don't care baby I don't care

2X
You say you don't know
(You're the marigold----in the background)
You say you can't grow
All I know is we're missing you