FanFic - Michael/Maria
"Static"
Part 3
by loki
Disclaimer: Michael, Maria and the rest of them don't belong to me. Not in the slightest. They are belong to the WB and a bunch of other folks.
Category: Michael/Maria
Rating: R
Authors Note: This, like all my Roswell fics, would be nothing without willa, my beta-goddess. Distribution: my site (http://www.frontiernet.net/~apascale) and anywhere that’s been archiving my stuff. otherwise, just ask!
They pulled into the driveway and parked next to the Sheriff’s truck. Neither of them made a move to get out, they just stared at the truck. “He’s still here.” Michael stated flatly.

“Yes, ‘Mr. State-the-Obvious,’ he’s still here.” Maria got out of the car and slammed the door. She stood up and stretched her arms across the hood. Michael got out and walked over to her side. He ran his finger down her back.

“Hey.”

“Look, you don’t have to stay. You’ve already done enough tonight.” She didn’t look at him.

Michael cocked his head at her. “I’m not going anywhere… unless you want me to. Do you want me to?”

Maria rolled against the car and faced him. She fixed her attention on the ground. “No.”

“Okay.”

She felt the angry, upset breathing return. All the calm from less than an hour before rushed out of her. Maria scrunched up her face and started inhaling rapidly. “I just don’t understand. I’ve never been able to understand.” She looked up into Michael’s face. Shrugging her shoulders, she went on. “I know it’s stupid, I know it’s selfish. All my life - I just could never understand why they were always so much more important. She loves me, I know that. But she’s always looking to them to make her happy. Because she couldn’t be happy just being my mom.” Maria dropped her eyes back to the ground, slightly embarrassed by her honesty.

“And Valenti - and her. My mother and Valenti. The man who went out of his way to terrify me. She’d rather spend her night with him than me.” She rolled her eyes skyward. “Do you know that she didn’t even remember that today was my day off? I always have Tuesday off. For over a year, I’ve had Tuesdays off. She just doesn’t know me. Maybe she doesn’t want to…”

Michael watched as a tear fell down her cheek, glistening light from the street lamp. He stepped in, studying her reaction to see what he should do next. She didn’t move, but looked directly into his eyes. Without breaking their gaze, he pulled her close and pressed his lips against her forehead. His arms slid around her back. Maria sank into his chest and sighed. Her hands reached up and pulled him closer. “Don’t go,” she whispered.

***

Closing the door quietly, Maria tried to slip up the stairs inconspicuously. She had made it about halfway up when her mother came into the living room.

“Maria?”

The girl thumped down two steps. “Yup. It’s me.”

Amy DeLuca put her hands in her pockets. “Where were you?”

“Oh, you know, around. I was at Liz’s and the Crashdown. Around.” Maria ran her hand up and down the banister.

Her mother looked confused. “But, Liz called a little while ago.” Jim Valenti came in and stood next to Amy. He made Maria nervous just by being there. She flashed back to that day in his office.

“Yeah, well, I ran into Alex downstairs, and I was hanging out with him. Liz had some stuff to do.” She hurriedly explained.

“Oh, ok!” Her mother bobbed her head. “As long as you had a good time.”

“I did.” Maria faked a yawn. “I’m so sleepy, so gonna go to bed. ‘Night.” She flew up the stairs without waiting for a response.

***

The window was already open when she got into her room. Maria peered out, but she couldn’t see Michael standing below like he was supposed to. She exhaled sadly. He had gone home. She didn’t blame him, really. It was creepy enough for her to have Valenti in her house, she could only imagine what it would feel like for Michael to be so close to the man who so badly wanted to get something, anything on him.

“Hey.”

Maria nearly slammed her head into the window pane. “Stop that,” she spat through gritted teeth. “You scared me.”

“Sorry,” Michael said, sitting on the bed. “I saw Valenti through the kitchen window, and when he left the room, I climbed up. Figured that it was best not to take the chance of him seeing me when they returned.”

“Makes sense,” she agreed. “But stop sneaking up on me.” She walked over and locked her door.

Michael leaned back against her pillows and brought his feet up. “But I like scaring you. Let’s face it, you don’t put up much of a challenge.”

Maria stuck her tongue out at him and kicked her shoes off, then turned on the television. Joining him on the bed, she grabbed the remote and flipped through the channels. Annoyed by her indecisiveness, Michael took it away from her and put it on the Discovery channel. Maria folded her arms in resignation and closed her eyes. She drifted off listening to a documentary on the mating rituals of sea snails.

***

Maria stretched out and reached for the blanket. The room had gotten colder as the hours passed and her sweater was no longer enough. Patting the bed, her sleepy daze threatened to be broken by the elusive quilt. She pulled her hand back, running it over Michael’s chest. Shocked by the realization, Maria yanked her hand back to her body and lay perfectly still. He was sleeping soundly, and it didn’t seem as if her motion had stirred him. She looked over her shoulder and saw that the window was still open. Conscientious of every movement, Maria sat up and walked over to the window to close it. On her way back, she grabbed a blanket off her chair and wrapped it around her.

“Hey,” Michael said, not moving.

Maria cringed. “Oh, I woke you up. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to.”

“No worry, I’m a light sleeper.” He turned his head to look at her. “I should probably get going anyway.”

“No - you don’t have to. Really.” She sat on the bed next to him.

Michael turned on his side and smiled. “Well, if you had another blanket… or are you going to give me that one?”

“Oh, you think you’re going to get it so easily? I don’t think so,” Maria snickered, pulling the fleece tighter around herself. “Mmm… I’m so nice and toasty warm,” she cooed.

Michael dragged her down so that she was lying next to him. He paused, looking to see where her hands were hidden. Maria started giggling beneath him as he tried to wrench the fabric from her grip. His fingers grazed her side, causing her to cry out in tickled anguish.

“Shh…” Michael whispered teasingly, his lips hovering above hers. “You don’t want to wake your mother - make her think that you’re up to no good.”

Feeling his body so close, his breath so warm, Maria couldn’t concentrate. She let go of the blanket and reached up for him, tangling her hands in his hair, drawing him to her lips. He kissed her hard, urgently, to make up for lost time. The fabric fell free, giving him greater access to her lithe body. He grasped her hip, massaging it firmly in time with their kisses. The chill from the night air was still in the room, but she seemed to be warming his body from the inside out.

Maria slid her hand to his neck and stroked it softly. She ran her thumb against the edge of his jaw. Michael broke away and littered kisses across her cheeks and down towards her throat. Maria moaned quietly, then edged herself up so that her lips could follow the same trail her thumb had just marked. Planting small kisses along his neck, she rolled Michael onto his back. His strong hands held her in place, then made their way up her sides pausing right below her breasts.

She could feel Michael growing harder beneath her. Maria bit his earlobe playfully, smug from the reaction that she was getting from him. Michael tried to sit up, inadvertently reaching for her breasts to steady himself. She inhaled sharply, both surprised and pleased by his touch. Afraid that he had taken things too far too soon, he immediately moved his hands back down to her waist.

“Michael,” Maria murmured pleadingly.

Michael sat back and fingered the bottom of her sweater. He looked into Maria’s eyes to make sure that she was on the same page that he was. She lifted her arms and he pulled it off in one move. There she sat, straddling him, clad in jeans and a skimpy tank top. He pushed the straps down off her shoulders and kissed her across her chest. Maria pressed against him, her soft skin beckoning his return. Michael slid the top over her head and paused for a second, breathing heavily against her stomach. She closed her eyes and concentrated on her breathing, rocking back and forth slowly.

She ran her fingers up under his t-shirt, surprised at how thin it was. The tip of her tongue traveled a steady line up from his shoulder blade towards his mouth. Thrusting it past his lips, she yanked Michael’s shirt up, separating from him only to pull it up over his head. She pressed him into the bed, then started to make her way down. Michael’s hunger grew with every small kiss down his chest, and every touch of her breasts against his stomach. He closed his eyes and tried to control his urges, but the feel of her tongue hovering above his waistband threatened to break down all his self-imposed barriers. Michael knew that if things went even a tiny step further, he wouldn’t be able to stop the insatiable passion from rushing in and enveloping them both. The fact that they were getting physical again was beginning to cause doubts in him, and he couldn’t bear to be the next one to hurt Maria tonight, or ever.

Maria’s hands began to unbutton the top of his jeans, while her lips still sent shivers of pleasure through Michael’s body. He moaned, letting himself enjoy them for a moment, before regaining control.

“Wait.”

Maria looked up at him lustfully. “I don’t want to wait,” she said in a husky voice.

Michael placed his hand over hers, and sat up. “No, really. Stop. We can’t do this.”

Maria’s face dropped. She sat back on her heels and crossed her arms in front of her chest. “God, I’m so stupid. I fell for it again.” She closed her eyes and shook her head.

“Please, no. It’s not that,” he tried to explain.

“What is it, then?” She snapped at him, hoping her anger would scare away her tears. “I wasn’t good enough this time? Or am I only good for saving your life, and not actually being with you?” Her words were full of rage.

Anything he said would come out wrong and only succeed in hurting her more. Michael quickly ran through his options. He thought of leaving, but that would only make Maria miserable, and wouldn’t solve anything. Neither would kissing her, although his body was trying to convince him that was the way to go. He decided to sit and wait, let her make the decision. If Maria wanted him to go, he would. That’s what he had told her earlier, that he would stay as long as she wanted him to. Michael looked toward the girl at the end of the bed, hoping for a sign. She wasn’t looking at him. He went to touch her, but she turned her body away from him sharply.

“No. You’re good enough for everything. I just… I just don’t want this to be about… well, this.” He said softly.

Her burning eyes returned to him, and he winced from the pain he knew he caused her. “About this? About what? Since you think you know me so well, tell me. I’m dying to know.”

Michael looked away from her for a moment, then met her stare. “I don’t want it to be about today - tonight. I know that you are upset, I know that you are feeling lonely and apart. It’s not fair for me to let you get into this when you are clouded by your emotions.”

Maria’s jaw dropped, and she gasped in disbelief. Standing up, she snatched her top from the floor and put it back on. “Wow, well, aren’t you the self-deluded one. I’m sorry to burst your bubble, but you are not my protector and I am quite capable of making my own decisions.” She threw him his shirt. “And since you have proven that you don’t know a damn thing about me, or what ‘this is about,’ I want you to leave.” Maria walked over to the window and opened it. “Now.”

Michael lowered his head shamefully and started to get dressed. He grabbed his jacket from the chair and stood next to Maria. He looked out the window towards the ground, and so many thoughts hit him at once. That if he left, it was all over - there would be no chance of even a friendship between them. That in some way, he needed her - and while he’d rather kiss Valenti than admit it out loud, Michael knew that deep in his soul. That maybe she was right, he didn’t know her as well as he thought he did, but that there were parts of her he knew very well. That he wasn’t going to leave her like this, at least without finding out what, for her, it was ‘about.’

Standing up, Michael pressed the one advantage he still had. Their proximity. Maria was never able to control herself completely when he was so near - either lashing out angrily or kissing him hungrily. Right now the passion was still heavy in the room. Michael knew that he could use that to keep her from kicking him out of her life completely. She looked up at him as he moved closer, stopping when there were just inches between their bodies. Maria stepped back into the wall for support.

“Tell me.”

“What?” Maria asked breathlessly.

For the moment, it was working. Michael leaned his arm against the wall next to her head. “Tell me what it’s about. Please.”

It was the ‘please’ that got to Maria. Her eyes filled tears and she blinked them away. “How could you think I would jump into bed with just anyone because I was feeling lonely? I wouldn’t do that. I thought you knew me better than that.” She almost choked on the last words.

Michael brushed her hair behind one ear. “Tell me,” he repeated tenderly.

“You know,” she smiled, “When you aren’t being completely unpredictable, or a complete jerk to me… I mean, oh God, how can I say this? I know it sounds strange, but you are one of the most stable things in my life.” A few tears rolled down her cheeks. “It’s like, whenever my life has hit some kind of horrendous low point, you are always there to cheer me up, albeit in the oddest of ways.” Maria laughed in spite of herself. “I love Liz and Alex, don’t get me wrong. They are wonderful friends. But lately… well, I guess it’s just that, when I’m dealing with something other than my heart being trampled on by Michael Guerin - and that tends to happen a lot - you are the one I want to be around. You are the one I am thankful for. You are the one I trust.”

The shock hit Michael all at once and nearly bowled him over. It was taking all of his strength to stay planted in one spot. Maria’s words echoed in his head: ‘stable,’ ‘thankful,’ ‘trust.’ They repeated and swirled so rapidly that he was beginning to feel dizzy. He needed to touch her, hold her, feel her, but most of all, he needed to sit down. Michael fixed his gaze into her eyes and willed his body to stay standing. He cupped her face in his hands and delicately brushed his fingers against her cheeks.

Maria relaxed at his touch and placed her hands over his. “So, so that’s what this is about. It’s about me needing a friend, and you being the friend I need. It’s about me needing you, and you letting me. And it’s about so much more than a bad day and feeling lonely. It’s about us. It always has been.”

“Maria,” he whispered, his lips nearly on hers. It was the first time that he had spoken her name all day, and it was the only thing that she had to hear. She stepped in and pressed her body against his. Instantly the images started. They flashed in rapid succession, but it was his thoughts and feelings about those scenes that held a bigger impact for Maria. Between the intensity of emotion in the room and their close proximity, Michael had unwittingly created ‘a connection’ between them.

//Michael walks past the Crashdown and sees Liz talking to Maria. He stands at the window for a moment and catches Maria’s eye.// That girl again, Michael noticed her as he was walking past the diner. He paused and watched her, trying to discern why exactly Isabel was hellbent on keeping her in a constant state of fear. In all honesty, he was a little impressed. Isabel could be quite the formidable foe, and Liz’s friend had yet to come unglued. Then she looked up at him and shuddered. Michael sighed and moved on. It wouldn’t be the first time he was wrong about someone.

//School. Michael walks down the hallway and runs into Maria. She grabs him by the arm and refuses to let him walk away from her.// He is confused, thrown by his own actions and now having to deal with the consequences of them. Maria stands in from of him, now the one in control of the situation. He snaps at her and tries to leave when she grabs him by the arm. Her touch sends a shockwave through his body - Michael takes a breath and composes himself. It wasn’t often that someone touched him, and even less that it was someone other than Max or Isabel.

//Night. It’s unbearably hot, and Michael feels the need to get out of his house. He heads out without a set destination, but something keeps drawing him to it. Finally he stops in town, in front of the Crashdown. Maria sees him outside, and meets his gaze. She walks to the door and unlocks it, a silent invitation which he accepts.// This time she initiated the contact, reaching up around his neck as he stood in front of her. Michael waited, slightly on edge, making sure that his desire was reciprocated. His lips met hers - her delicious full lips - lips that he’d been thinking about since that night in the café. Faster and faster, voracious kisses followed one another until they could barely stand to be apart from one another. Maria hopped up into his arms, and Michael pulled her in as tightly as humanly possible. As alienly possible. He tried to find a way to hold her even closer while covering her body in kisses. Michael ran his hand down the length of her body, knowing full well that this was something he never wanted to leave.

//Maria stands in front of him at the rave, confronting him about his avoidance. He watches her eyes well as he tells her that he should have never started anything with her.// Once again, she’s confronted him. With everything, she never seemed to be afraid of him - not to yell at him or, more importantly, touch him. Almost immediately he considered backtracking on his decision to leave her. But he had already done the thing he feared most - hurt her by simply being who he was. Max had tried convince him that getting too close was a bad idea, how was Michael supposed to tell him that he already was? But like almost always he deferred to Max, and rationalized that breaking it all off now would be easier for everyone. It wasn’t as if he had actually gotten used to someone wondering where he was, asking what his plans were, wanting to spend time with him - someone… caring. No, no… she would be better off without him. Michael glanced over one more time and then looked away. He couldn’t bear to watch her go.

He was equally terrified and calmed by Maria. Her recent admission unsettled his balance even more. He had spent the last ten years becoming as self-sufficient as possible - his only ties being to Isabel and Max, although there were good reasons for that. In the past few months, Michael could tell that he was getting attached to more than just them, and he knew that attachments always led to pain and disappointment, in addition to making it difficult to leave at a moment’s notice.

Michael started to tremble in her arms. Part of him wanted to drop his hands and get out of the room, but it was the way that Maria looked back at him that kept him there. He felt more of his barriers break and let her in. Let her understand a little more about what was going on in his head. Things that he could never say to her, things that he had rarely spoken to Max about. She trusted him, and it was his way of feeling worthy of her trust. He heard her words again - ‘stable’ and ‘thankful.’ Michael didn’t know the last time someone was actually thankful for him. Maybe Isabel, she seemed to understand him a little better than Max did. Isabel could get just as fixated on one thing, determined to see it through. But Michael always felt that he needed them more than they needed him.

Here, now, was this girl in front of him who needed him. And he wanted to be needed - by her. Michael had almost laughed when Maria said ‘stable.’ That was a word never spoken in the same breath as his name. But he knew she meant it, every single word. Michael held her face firmly and leaned down, kissing her. For as many kisses as they had exchanged, this one managed to stand apart from them all. It still maintained the same fiery passion as the ones before, but this time there was something stronger between them. A little bit of the wall had come down on both sides and they each flowed into the other a bit more freely. It seemed to be eons before they stopped to breathe, which only happened because rational thought had taken over for a brief moment.

Neither Michael nor Maria felt the loss of air.

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