FanFic - Other
"Don't Speak"
Part 40
by Jamie Phelps
Disclaimer: Don't own the Characters or the title. Never have, never will. Would love too :-)
Summary: Michael, Max, Maria, Isabel, Liz, Alex, Tess and Kyle's lives seem back on track. With Max and Liz's wedding quickly approaching, all seems perfect. Then the mysterious Jennifer arrives in Roswell and things quickly spiral out of control. Maria leaves Michael, Isabel learns one of the group is keeping a secret, and Max and Liz begin fighting. Taye is drawn to Jennifer, yet doesn't understand why. When Tess questions Jennifer's motives, she disappears. Who is the mysterious Jennifer? And will life as we know it in Roswell ever be the same?
Category: Other
Rating: R
Authors Note: Thanks to Cari for helping me come up with a title for this piece. I owe you one! You must have read "Secrets", "The Journey" and "Letting Go" or this fiction will not make sense to you. Please email at jamiep@egyptian.net or see them at Fan Forum if you need the other fictions.
Max unlocked the door to their apartment and walked in. He felt like a part of him was missing. They'd never left Jacey anywhere since that night.

Liz brushed past him and made her way to the kitchen. She leaned against the counter and took a deep breath. She knew Max would be on full alert until Jacey was back in the house. But when wasn't Max on full alert for Jacey?

She thought back over the last four years. After she'd lost the baby. Max had changed. Even Isabel commented about how distracted Max has become. He never talked to Liz anymore. She always had to pry information out of him. Any free time he had he spent with Jacey or at work. He'd even pulled away from Michael. Liz began to feel guilty over losing the baby. Max's baby. He never wanted to talk about it, which made her feel he was mad at her. If it hadn't been for Isabel and Maria she would have gone crazy.

She'd thought about leaving Max. It wasn't that he was a bad husband; he just wasn't there emotionally. But she knew she could never love anyone like she loved Max. Even when their sex life dwindled away to nothing she stood beside him. She had to admit it hurt, but she was determined to make things work.

Then tonight, at Jacey's birthday, she saw a glimpse of the Max she loved. The Max she'd fell in love with and had a beautiful daughter with. His smile, the laughter, something she hadn't heard but a few times since the loss of the baby. As suddenly as it had appeared, it left. When Tess had asked for Jacey to stay, that familiar sadness filled his eyes. But then he 'd surprised her by changing his mind. He'd been quiet ever since. The drive home carried a serious overtone and Liz just needed to get away. She reached up and pulled a glass out of the cupboard and filled it with water. Maybe Maria had been right. She'd been playing the good wife roll long enough. She missed the way things used to be between them.

"You think I should call and tell Jacey goodnight?" Max asked walking into the kitchen.

"She's fine Max." Liz said setting the glass onto the table. "Tess won't let anything happen to her, you know that. Besides, Taye is there too."

"He couldn't help the last time." Max mumbled under his breath.

Liz looked at him. She couldn't believe what he'd just said. "What did you say?" She asked, anger rising inside her.

"Nothing." Max said. "I'm just tired."

Liz continued looking at him. "We are going to deal with this right now." She said slowly. "Living room, NOW."

She moved past him angrily and made her way into the living room. She sat down on the couch and waited for him. Minutes later he appeared at the door.

"Liz can we please ----" His words were cut off.

"We've been putting off this discussion for four years Max. This is the time for it. You owe me that much." Liz said heatedly.

Max could see she was on the verge of tears. He walked into the room and sat down beside her. "What do you want to talk about?" He asked slowly.

"The baby." Liz said slowly.

"This is craz----" But he was cut off by Liz again.

"Just let me talk for once. Listen to me." Liz pleaded.

Max nodded his head. "OK."

"You weren't the only one to loose that baby Max. I did too and so did Michael, Maria, Isabel, Alex, Tess, Kyle, Taye, Jacey, Logan and Jodi. So did my parents and your parents. But we got through it. We talked about it. That was the only thing that kept us sane. And do you know who took it the hardest?" Liz now had tears streaming down her face. "Taye." She said slowly. "He blamed himself for the loss of our child. He had to have a year of counseling after that. Did you realize that? You've changed Max. Nothing has been the same since that day. I miss the old Max that I fell in love with. What happened to him?"

Max looked away. He didn't want to face what had happened, but he saw that Liz was slipping away. He had to do something to keep her. He knew he'd changed. But how could she be in love with someone who couldn't protect her?

"I'm sorry, Liz." He said slowly. "I've been a jerk. But how can you love me when I couldn't protect you. I promised I'd never let you get hurt because of me the day we married. I broke that promise. I just don't feel like I deserve you." He looked down.

Liz reached over and took his hand in hers. "Don't say that. I knew what I was getting into the day I married you. You're the only man I've ever loved. What happened to me wasn't your fault."

Max turned and looked out the window. "I killed him." He said slowly.

Liz shook her head, confused. "Who did you kill?"

Max drew in a long breath. "The man who attacked you." He began. "The night of the attack I needed to think. I ended up outside of Roswell. On the way back into town I passed him. I lost it and used my powers on him. I killed him, Liz."

Liz moved closer to Max. She put her arms around his waist and hugged him. "It's ok, Max." She said comfortingly. "You did what you had to do." She knew she shouldn't push him, but since he was willing to open up she continued on.

"Why don't you want anymore children?" Liz asked slowly.

Max was caught off guard by the question. He looked away for a moment and then turned back. "It's too risky." He said. "Next time I could loose you. I couldn't handle that Liz. You and Jacey are my life. I can't worry about loosing either of you."

Liz brushed her lips gently across his lips. "Whether or not you choose to believe it, you're stuck with me." She said smiling. "I understand if you don't want more kids, but does that mean we have to continue to abstain from that thing we used to enjoy so much together?"

Max cracked a smile. "And I thought I was the only one missing it."

Liz smiled and leaned in close to him. "I'll show you what you've missed." She said, placing her lips on his.

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