This was his favorite way to watch Maria. From a distance, when she was oblivious to the world around her. It was the safest for him - minimal possibility of contact and he could study her movements without arousing suspicion. He didn't have to worry about conversation, where his eyes were falling, or how it would feel to run his hands over her curves, pressing her body against his. No, from his vantage point across the darkened room there was no chance of anything like that happening. Anything that would send him home to lie hopelessly awake in his bed, thinking of her... skin.

Her hands raised above her head, moving around in circular patterns. Her eyes were closed and there was a look of such peaceful contentment on her face. That was another reason he liked to watch her here. It was if the whole world had melted away ~ all her troubles, all the people ~ and she could let it all go and just be.

Michael was completely unable to take his eyes off of her, not that he wanted to. A small smile hinted at her lips while her eyelids continued to shut the world out. The lights from above sparkled around her, and all her surroundings faded from his vision. There was a slight glow around her which only added to her ethereal appearance.

Now her hands crossed behind her head and started down towards her neck. He could see her fingertips dancing lightly against the dip into her shoulder blade.

Michael groaned quietly, remembering the many times his lips brushed against the sweet silkiness of that same area. Finally, her hands disappeared, only to reappear on her sides, smoothing her shirt down. Sliding past her breasts, they kept traveling until they rested on her hips, sitting above her fitted jeans.

"How long am I going to keep doing this to myself?" Michael grumbled and slammed down the rest of his soda. It had been some time since he'd watched her last, getting more and more difficult to distance himself each time. Still, when he overheard Liz and Maria making plans, he couldn't resist the urge to stop by - inconspicuously, of course. In fact, he never left the side wall. It would be easier to make a speedy exit that way.

His daze was broken by the seemingly abrupt change in music. He looked up to see that Liz had now joined Maria on the dance floor. She had brought over a glass of water, and the two started giggling about something. They moved towards the tables in the back and Michael decided that it was time to go.

Glancing over one more time, he caught himself smiling at the sight of Maria leaning over the table laughing, probably recanting one of her typically flaky stories. Zipping up his jacket, he pushed past the crowd that was making its way into the club.

Michael was almost to the end of the parking lot when he felt the rock that was pelted into the middle of his back. He angrily whipped around, fists clenched in preparation for a fight. But no one was there. He stood still, confused, until the sound of footsteps grew louder.

"I knew I couldn't catch up with you." Maria came into view, breathing heavily. "You had a pretty good lead on me."

"So, you hit me with a rock?" He asked, trying to sound more annoyed than nervous.

"Well, I wanted you to stop. I didn't know how else..." she paused to catch her breath.

He looked past her, and then back into her face. "But, how did you? I mean, you were pretty far away."

"Softball, five years."

"Wow," Michael nodded his head, impressed. "Remind me never to - "

"Shut up. Just shut up, okay?" The girl interrupted him, her tone bordering on fury.

Michael didn't move. He knew he was caught.

"Are you ever going to talk to me? Or are you planning on hiding in corners and watching me for the rest of our lives?" She straightened herself and scratched the back of her head nervously.

"I don't know what you are talking about." He was finally able to break her gaze. Staring off towards the road, he continued. "I just... just stopped in. I didn't feel like going home, and Max and Isabel aren't around. It was on the way. I didn't even realize that you were there."

Maria closed her eyes for a moment and shook her head, exasperated. "Give me some credit here. I might not have some big powers from the great beyond, but I know when you're around me."

Michael looked back at her in surprise. Taking a deep breath, she nodded her head. "I always know," she admitted quietly.

"Why didn't you" He broke off.

"Say anything?" She shrugged her shoulders. "I figured that you had your reasons. And I guess I liked knowing that you were around. Even if you were doing it in a creepy-stalkerish kind of way."

Michael looked down at the ground, and kicked a few stones around his feet. "But I'm getting tired of playing this game. I just want to know... are you planning on following me around, or will you actually talk to me - not in the context of the group?"

"Maria - I talk to you."

"No." She stated firmly. "You don't. You make comments, you'll refer to me - and hardly use my name, mind you - and I get these intense looks that I feel even when my back is turned. But you don't talk to me."

"What, what do you want me to say to you?" Michael cocked his head in condescension.

"You know what? Forget it. Don't say anything." She turned around to go back. "No, no. While I have you here, I want you to make a decision. Either decide to actually start being 'a friend,' or stop all this and just leave me be."

He looked at her blankly. "Okay, then. I'll leave you be." He stared at the girl in front of him for a moment, as if to etch her image permanently into his brain. Then he started back towards the road.

"God!" Maria cried out in anguish. "Don't you get it, space boy? I don't *want* you to leave me be." She jogged up to him and grabbed his arm. "I'm not asking for everything. I just don't understand why it has to be nothing."

It was when she touched him that Michael literally felt weak. There was something about her touch - whether she was clenching his arm or running her fingers through his hair, that would cause an inner trembling that almost nothing would quell.

The only thing that he had found to calm it was her kisses, but that was probably because he was paying more attention to her lips, her breath and her body beneath him, and feeling himself flow into her. He concentrated on his breathing, trying to control his urge to press his lips against her ruby red ones.

'Stone Wall.'

His silence drove a knife into her heart. "You can't even give me that, can you?" Maria said, failing to keep the emotion of out her voice. "Ok - I get it. I'll go now." She let go of his arm and crossed her arms tightly around her for warmth. "See you around, I guess."

"Maria."

Michael's voice called out to her in the darkness. Maria stopped dead in her tracks and turned around. With a painful smile, she shook her head at him. "I can't do this anymore. You don't get to have me when you want, and ignore me the rest of the time. I'm not going to push something between us any more - but you have to respect my wishes, too."

He walked over to her and stared down into her face. "We can't do this, you know that. It's not..."

"Oh spare me the 'It's not safe' and 'I don't get intense' speech. In fact, I've heard enough of the 'I'm a loner' one, too. Get over it, Michael." She snapped. "And maybe you should ask yourself why you keep following me if it's 'not right.'"

"I wasn't... oh, forget it. It's impossible to talk to you. You just don't get it." Michael looked up into the sky, anything to get away from her glaring eyes.

"Yeah, I forgot about that one too. You know, you really should come up with some new reasons that you can't be with me - because these ones are getting pretty old."

Maria stepped in close to him. He could smell her sweat mixed in with the jasmine oil she had put on earlier. It radiated off her and started to make his body quiver.

"Tell me that you don't like me. Tell me that you aren't attracted to me. Tell me that you can't stand to spend another minute around me." She poked him in the chest with every demand. "Tell me those things and you will never have to concern yourself with me again."

Michael grabbed her hand in his, knowing that he was about to step off into the abyss. Before she could protest, he entwined his fingers in her hair, crushing her against his lips. Her unexpectant mouth had been slightly open, so Michael took the liberty of sucking her bottom lip between his own.

She whimpered softly, a sweet little cry of pleasure. Michael freed her momentarily before gently coaxing her mouth to open wider. As he dipped his tongue into her mouth, he caressed her fingers with his thumb.

Everything melted away as it had done before. Only this time Michael was actually with her, in her glow, feeling her breath become his. This is how he wanted it to stay - the two of them in their own world apart from everyone else. There was no one to judge them, no one to come and rip them from each other.

Michael relaxed his grip on her hair and cradled her head in his palm. They were surrounded by blackness, and the only sounds he could hear were the beating of her heart and the little gasps of air between furious kisses.

His usual uneasiness subsided - ignoring the knowledge that this moment shall come to an end as they all had done before. This is all he wanted, all he could handle at this point in time. In his life, Michael had come to expect that everything could fall apart at a moment's notice. With Maria, he tried to knock it down before he got too involved.

Problem was, ever since that trip down to Marathon, he was more involved than he could have ever imagined.

Dropping her fist, Michael pressed his hand against the other side of her head. This was still safe - as long as he wasn't actually touching her *skin,* he'd be okay.

The walls he had up would stay standing - he could keep himself from being any more entwined into her life, into her. She moaned as he brushed her hair with his fingers, needing more.

Breaking past the invisible barrier he had put between them, Maria slid her hand up his chest and around his neck. Michael flinched at her touch.

Feeling his reaction, Maria pulled away from him angrily. "You can't do this to me anymore. It's not fair. I'm not some girl you can kiss when no one is around, when *you* feel like it."

To her surprise, Michael didn't make some snide comment or stalk off. Instead, he rested his forehead on her shoulder, placing one hand on her opposite hip.

She tenderly rubbed the back of his neck, combing through his hair with her fingers. He exhaled deeply, and she didn't miss the profound sorrow in his action.

Her anger didn't dissipate completely, but an understanding swept through the both of them. Maria was touched that he would let her see him in such a vulnerable state.

"Michael," she murmured against his temple, still caressing his hair. He grasped her hip tighter, as if she were his own personal safety blanket. Tears sprung to her eyes and she kissed him. "I'm here, Michael. I'm not going anywhere."

Once again, it had all gone so terribly wrong. Only this time Michael accepted the fact that he didn't have all the answers - or any answers, for that matter. Thrusting her from his life had only succeeded in making him feel even more miserable and alone.

He hadn't expected his latest reaction, either. It was as if his body took over, insisting that it knew what was best. To be next to Maria. Her skin, seconds earlier almost reaching a fiery temperature, had now cooled, soothing the headache brought on by her directed anger. Not just her anger, but her decision to leave him.

Without even trying, Michael had fallen back into his old routine - pushing her away as soon as she'd gotten too close.

'Too close.' What exactly did that mean? Could Maria ever truly get too close to him? Most of the time, Michael felt that she wasn't close enough.

His lips had covered much of her body, yet he always ached to get closer. As she described his very runaway fantasy in her own words, and he realized that she was the one who understood. So what did it mean for her to be 'too close'? Michael repeated those words over and over in his head until they ceased to make any sense. He wondered how they ever did.

Maria curled her arm underneath Michael's, lightly running her fingertips up and down his back. He sighed again, this time pulling her closer to him, wrapping his arm all the way around her waist.

She let out a little noise as he suddenly moved, taking her by the hips and boosting her up on to the car behind them. Michael placed his hands on her knees and kissed the tip of her nose. The girl raised an eyebrow in confusion, there had never been time for such delicateness before.

Pressing his forehead against hers, Michael spoke hesitantly. "You're not just some girl." He paused, closing his eyes. "You're Maria."

Maria laughed in embarrassment, immediately hoping that he wouldn't think it was directed at him. She had accepted her lot in life as "Liz's wacky friend" - an average student who had found her own niche. But acceptance was a lot different than being content. Maria had long since given up on believing that being 'Maria DeLuca' was anything worthwhile. After all, it didn't seem that way to her father.

"Yeah, well, what does that really mean, anyway?" She sniffed, looking away.

Michael leaned over and brushed his lips against her cheek. Stopping just short of her ear, he whispered, "A lot."

She snickered, and lowered her head. Shaking her head softly, Maria started to rub her eyes. "I told myself that I wasn't going to let you get to me like this anymore." She looked up into the intense hazel eyes that were now staring down at her. "Why do you do this to me? Why can't you just be... normal?"

Michael stepped away, sliding his hands off her knees. "I'm... You're right. I shouldn't be doing this." As he turned away, Maria grabbed him by the wrist.

"No, dammit. Every time I bring up anything about us, you get all distant and stoic. Not this time, buddy." She tightened her grip. "You're not getting away so easily. And you are not getting a choice in the matter."

Pulling him towards her, Maria took hold of his other hand. She could feel his body recoil from her for the second time that night. Letting him go, she leaned back on the car.

"Why do you freak out when I touch you? I can feel the intense panic that you start to..." Maria stopped short. "Wait a minute. You haven't touched me all night."

Michael rolled his eyes. "Excuse me? Where have you been? I believe there's been quite a bit of touching. You can't lay that on me."

"That's not what I mean," Maria said, trying to piece together her thoughts. "You've pulled away every time I've touched you. Your skin." She scrunched her eyebrows. "And you've been pretty careful not to let your hands run to places unclothed." Meeting his eyes again, she questioned him. "Why? Is it something about me? Is there something I should know about? What are you afraid of?"

"Me? I'm not afraid of anything," he scoffed. Taking a meandering visual cruise down her body, Michael added, "Especially not you. I've touched you before. It's not some big scary thing."

"Do it then." She dared him.

"Oh, so you think I'll do something just because you're taunting me? Sorry, sweetie, it doesn't work that way."

Maria took his hands in hers. "Show me how it works." Without breaking their gaze, she placed his hands under her shirt, above her hips.

Michael inhaled sharply, and immediately felt the rush of excitement, anxiety and anticipation surge through him. This is what he was afraid of, what he couldn't tell her. That it would take over and he'd once again be vulnerable. It always started with one little thing. A look, a kiss... a touch.

Sometimes it was the touching that affected him the most. In fact, it was the smallest things, the unexpected way her hand would brush against him in comfort that got to him more than anything else. So he distanced himself physically from her as much as he could. To keep the walls up, to keep everything out.

Maria always had a way of breaking down the walls he constructed, whether she meant to or not. Right now, he felt a few more bricks tumbling to the ground.

"Oh God, Maria."

It felt as if there were sparks of electricity between her skin and his fingertips. Maria drew him towards her, their lips experiencing the same tingling. Michael crushed against her passionately, his arms holding her steady as he lay her down on the hood of the car. She mindlessly began to play with Michael's hair while her legs snaked around his. His hand flew to her thigh, gripping it, making Maria moan into his mouth.

He left her lips momentarily, marking a burning trail of kisses down towards her breasts. Maria arched up towards him, and he took the opportunity to skim his fingers against the worn denim up towards her hips. Hooking his first two fingers inside her jeans, he moved them towards the zipper.

Maria's hands quickly flew to Michael, jerking him back up towards her lips. He found her mouth warmer than before, her tongue inviting him in. She squeezed the back of his neck gently, but forcefully, speeding up her kisses as she felt his hand work its way towards her belly button. When he unsnapped the top button, the sudden brush of air on her stomach broke Maria out of her animalistic hunger.

"Michael, Michael." She held him an inch away from her body. "Not here."

Not comprehending what she was trying to say, he scrunched his eyebrows and kissed her neck. "Is here better?"

Maria giggled, then pushed him further away. "No, I mean, not this. Not here." She caressed his face with the tips of her fingers. "I don't want this to be here, in some cheesy parking lot. There has to be somewhere else we can go."

Nodding, he balanced himself between her legs. "Where do you want to go?"

"Um, let's see. Well, my mom is home, with friends. So that's kind of out."

"Hank is probably passed out somewhere, but you wouldn't want to..." Michael caught himself mid-sentence. He couldn't believe that he just said that. The last place he'd want to take Maria was to his trailer.

"Yes."

He shot her a confused look. "Yes, what?"

"Yes," she repeated. "Yes, I would want to go... to your house. With you."

"No..." Michael looked away. "I don't think that's a good idea. I'm sure there is somewhere else..."

Maria sat up and buttoned her jeans. "It's where you live. I want to be with you, where you live."

He just shook his head. "Trust me, you don't want to be there. *I* don't want to be there."

Reaching for his hand, Maria smiled. "All that matters to me is that I'm with you. I don't care about anything else."

The loud thumping bass from the club broke into the silence. Sighing heavily, Michael acquiesced. "Ok... ok."

Her smile growing broader, Maria slipped off the car. "I just have to tell Liz that I'm going." She handed him the keys. "Go get the car, and meet me in the front?"

"Yeah, yeah." Michael grumbled. "You just love to take advantage of me."

"Ooooh... that's what I'm doing." She crossed her arms. "*I'm* taking advantage of *you*."

Michael fingered the keys and smirked. "Shut up and go tell Liz. I'll be waiting for you." He met her eyes in nervous anticipation. "Hurry up."

Feeling strangely triumphant, Maria kissed his cheek and ran off in the direction of the music.

***

"So, everything cool?" Michael asked as Maria snapped the seatbelt into place.

"Yup," Maria nodded. "It's all good."

"Liz is cool?"

Snickering to herself, Maria answered, "Liz is cool. Suspicious, but it's fine."

"What do you mean," his tone suddenly on edge, "'Suspicious'?"

"You know Liz and her..." She paused. "I guess you don't know her looks. Well, when I told her that I had to go, she gave me a disbelieving 'Uh-huh,' and her 'I won't ask now, but you better tell me what's going on tomorrow' look."

"Uh," Michael said, refusing to look at the girl next to him. "What are you going to tell her?"