This is how I feel.

I'm cold and I am shamed,

Lying naked on the floor.

Illusion never changed,

Into something real.

I'm wide awake

And I can see the perfect sky is torn.

You're a little late,

I'm already

Torn.

Torn."

The wind in her hair, the sun on her face.

A little doubt was nagging her as to whether or not she could talk her way out of serious trouble when she and Max returned from their little adventure, but she just ignored it.

"We need this," is what Max had said.

And he was right.

How long had it been since anything was about just the two of them?

Oh, god, had it ever just been about them?

It felt like they had always been burdened with looking after everyone else. Everything they did affected the group. Everyone had to be protected; everyone had to be kept safe.

And now with Tess in the way...

Liz shook her head in determination.

She glanced over at Max and smiled gently.

He was here with her, not with Tess.

And she was NOT going to sit here and dissect every reason why.

She was going to enjoy it. Their time together alone.

She laughed aloud and smiled at Max when he glanced at her, amused.

"So, when are you going to tell me," she asked.

"Tell you what," Max asked with an engaging smile.

"Everything. You said you were going to tell me everything."

Liz watched curiously as Max hesitated, then smiled.

"I was just going to tell you that no one is going to come between us."

She couldn't help but agree.

In his presence, she felt like there were no obstacles, like all the fears and fates were just a distant memory.

Here, with him, it was like he had said he wanted it on that night not so long ago. Just the two of them, running away from everyone and everything.

Her gaze lingered on his lips as she scooted closer and slipped her arm up on top of his.

"What," he said, obviously distracted by her nearness. "If you keep looking like that at me, I'm gonna have to pull over."

If he thought that was going to discourage her, he was sadly mistaken.

Liz moved in a little closer, breathing hotly on his neck.

"Is that a threat, or a promise?"

A smile answered her question, but he kept driving.

"Where are we going, anyway," she finally asked, trailing a finger along the outline of his jaw.

He swallowed.

Liz's eyes skipped ahead up the road to a motel coming into view.

Days Rest Inn was a hole-in-the-wall, but it would definitely qualify as a place to have alone time.

But Max couldn't be thinking...

Liz searched his face as she wondered.

"Max," she whispered, not daring to speak further.

His eyes flickered over to the motel and back to the road.

She took a calming breath.

But when he began to slow down, her heart began to flutter uncontrollably.

He pulled the steering wheel to the right and exited off the highway, heading straight for the motel.

******

"Room 26," Max said with a grin as she watched him get in the car.

She was still in shock over the turn of events.

Max Evans renting a motel room for them to be alone in?

He was so sweet to do this... although it made her a little nervous.

Come on, Liz, she lectured herself.

It's not like they were likely to find anyplace to be truly alone in Roswell.

Everyone needed them too much.

And *she* was back there, vying for his attention now.

Liz bit her bottom lip and looked over at Max.

But Tess was nowhere near now.

Max hadn't asked her to come away with him.

He didn't even want to be near her.

Liz snapped back to reality as Max eased the car into a parking place.

Room number twenty-six, dead ahead.

A funny feeling in the pit of her stomach made her frown momentarily.

Why was she scared?

This was Max she was with.

She heard her door open, and realized he was standing beside her, holding the car door open.

Always such a gentleman.

Liz got out and slid her arm through his, pulling close to him for comfort.

She couldn't look at his face right now, feeling suddenly very shy.

What did he expect from her?

As he put the key in the lock and turned it, she felt the shifting of his muscles through his jacket.

Taking a deep breath, she reminded herself that this was the man who had risked everything to save her life, who had won her heart with his gentleness.

And he pushed the door open and led her in.

******

Okay, she thought, it's not the nicest place in the world.

The slight musky smell that permeated the room made her wrinkle her nose as she crossed to the bathroom.

In the mirror, she could see Max taking off his jacket and watching her every move.

"I'm just going to freshen up," she said lightly, smiling in his direction.

But Max had other ideas.

"No need," he said, crossing to her quickly.

She laughed as he crushed her into his embrace.

"But I'm all dusty from the road," she protested weakly.

Max just growled at her and pulled her head to the side, burying his mouth in the tender skin there.

Liz was startled by his directness.

"Max," she said, trying to ease him away so she could look him in the eyes. "Max, what are you doing?"

He stopped for a moment to stare at her, then suddenly smiled.

"Oh, sorry, just... impatient, I guess," he said, brushing a hair away from her face. "How did we do it last time?"

Liz hesitated, then smiled.

"Do what, Max?"

"You know," he said playfully. "This."

He ran his fingers through her hair and tilted her head back. His lips hungrily nibbled at her skin.

Liz closed her eyes and enjoyed the sensation, feeling his hands smoothing across her back. They slid up under her sweater, making her gasp.

"You like that," he whispered, running his hands up and down over her skin.

"Yes," she breathed out, sliding her hands up under his shirt without a second thought.

His movements immediately became more passionate.

He picked her up, sliding her legs around his waist, pushing against her and walking to the bed.

Liz felt the rush of emotion and clung to him.

They fell on the bed and he almost crushed the breath out of her.

Immediately, he pulled away slightly to grab at the bottom of her sweater.

Liz felt the cold air and his warm lips hit her long before she realized that she was now without a top or a bra.

"Oh, Max," she whispered.

He was making her feel incredible things...

But... wait...

"Max, wait-" she started.

He grasped the fastening on her jeans and she put her hand on his, hating to embarass him...

But he just ignored it, ripping them open with one tug.

As his weight pushed her deeply into the bed and his hands undressed her lower half, Liz suddenly felt panicked.

"Max, Max, wait," she pushed at his chest, succeeding in only making herself feel completely helpless against him.

Suddenly, he pulled away, gripping her jeans and slowly sliding them off of her legs.

He met her eyes as he crawled back up her body.

Liz felt her heart pounding.

She almost didn't recognize him.

His eyes were predatory, his expression amused.

By her fear.

She pulled away from him, quickly scrambling to a sitting position.

His eyes roamed over her bare legs and stomach, finally flickering to her face.

"M-Max," she whispered. "What are we doing?"

His eyes slanted with amusement.

"This is a bed, in a motel. What did you think we were going to do?"

Liz blinked.

He didn't even care that he had scared her.

Her face flushed in anger.

"Nothing that I didn't want to do."

Her eyes searched his for some small piece of regret or apology for his behavior.

He stared back at her without expression, the beautiful eyes cold.

Liz felt tears gather in her eyes.

He had treated her like a... a...

"Take me home, now!"

She swung her legs over to the side of the bed, so many emotions crowding her thoughts.

But before she had time to dissect them, she felt strong, brutal hands grab at her and she was flat on her back.

The breath was forced out of her by the full force of his weight on her, but as soon as she gathered enough, a scream split the air.

One of his hands snaked up her neck and grasped her throat, cutting off the sound.

Liz clutched at her throat as his hands moved back down to grab at her panties.

He had manipulated her voice box somehow.

She screamed silently, tears of frustration and betrayal gathering in her eyes.

How did she come to this? What had she done wrong?

For just a moment, his weight leaned off of her as he stripped off his pants and boxers.

She immediately sat up and shoved at him.

He was caught off balance and cursed as he fell off the bed.

Liz scrambled off the other side, her blood pounding in her ears as she raced for the door, her nakedness completely forgotten.

Like a nightmare, time slowed down; the door was miles away...

And then Max was back.

He grabbed her once again, hauling her off of her feet and throwing her to the floor.

Liz was stunned by the impact, but her instinct for survival kicked in immediately.

She scrambled and as she felt him touch her again, and kicked out at him, connecting hard with his left thigh.

He grunted and cursed, grabbing her heels and spreading her legs apart with a jerk.

Liz tried to scream again as he fell to his knees between her legs.

And it was his face over her, the face she loved that she couldnąt look at anymore.

A wave of nausea came over her.

Good, she thought fiercely, throw up on him. Then he'll stop.

His hands were on her breasts, his mouth on hers before she could think another thought.

But

she saw things,

flashes, like before, only... different...

A dark sky,

a dead body,

clouds...

And she knew that it wasn't him.

The knowledge speared her into immobility.

She lay there under his assault, her mind slowly coming to terms with the realization.

This wasn't Max.

Nasedo, she whispered silently against his cheek, as a sudden stabbing pain travelled up her body.

Bastard, bastard, bastard, bastard, she chanted in her mind, trying to ignore the pain as he leaned into her over and over.

Not Max, Not Max, Not Max, she reminded herself.

She closed her eyes against the sight of him.

She was ten years old again, at the dentist's office, trying to pretend the drill didnąt hurt.

Playing mind games, watching a reel-to-reel of memories, shutting off the turmoil in her body.

Finally, she felt him collapse over her.

He was weak now, and she felt revulsion as she pushed and kicked at him until he rolled off of her.

He sat up and looked over his shoulder at her fighting the sobs racking her body.

"Was it good for you," he smiled.

She jumped to her feet and looked around in fury.

The t.v.

She reached out and shoved it off the counter at him.

He lifted a hand and stopped it easily, letting it fall to the ground with a bored expression.

"Pitiful little human," he said without pity. "Get dressed. We have a long way to go."

Liz's eyes opened wide as he turned away from her to grab his clothes.

Go?

How could she go anywhere with... him?

She grabbed her clothes shakily and headed for the bathroom.

"Two minutes," he barked at her.

She closed the door behind her and fell against it heavily. The sobs were shaking her body, her breaths coming in uneven gasps. She tried to speak to calm herself, but no sound came out.

"He- he- he isn't Max," she tried to say. "Max will find me. Max will find me. Max won't leave me alone..."

But she was alone.

She grabbed a towel and shoved it into her mouth, fighting against the hysterical sobs.

She heard his voice through the walls plainly.

"Shut up, I'm making an important phone call."

Liz sucked in a deep breath and tried to find a place to put all the hatred that was vibrating throughout her body.

"Yes, I'd like to have the manager sent out to my room immediately. There's a problem I have to speak to him about."

Liz couldn't believe her ears. He wanted someone to come out there?

Why?

Maybe the manager would see her, help her.

She frantically wiped the towel between her legs several times without looking at the aftermath, and pulled on her panties and jeans.

A loud crash made her fall to the ground in fear.

She covered her mouth with her hand.

"Yeah, I'm afraid that was a mirror. Oops... Well, he better get out here or I'll trash the whole room. Got it?"

Liz stood up shakily and pulled on her sweater.

But she couldn't open the door.

She heard him prowling around out there, turning over the table with a crash, and pushing the bed up on its side.

Then there was a knock at the door.

Liz stayed put.

She suddenly had a bad feeling about this.

The door opened.

"I want to know what the- what have you done to my room? You will be paying for this," came the angry voice from outside.

Liz had to at least try to escape.

She took a deep breath and pushed open the door slighty, wondering why there were no more voices.

She paused, hearing footsteps coming in her direction.

The door swung the rest of the way open, revealing Nasedo with an amused look in his eyes.

"Come out, little mouse. The first sign is complete. Time to hit the road."

He grabbed her arm and propelled her to the door.

Liz gasped as she saw the manager dead on the floor, a silver handprint glowing on his chest, burned through his shirt.

She tried to jerk away from him, but he just gripped her arm even more painfully.

Liz saw several people exiting the motel's office.

But they were in the car and speeding away before anyone even noticed them.