| "Farther" |
| Part 1 by Danielle |
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Disclaimer: I swear, I have thought about stealing Michael, but I really
can't because then the show would miss him. So Jason Katims and the rest of
you WB people, relax. He's safe. For now. Category: Michael/Maria Rating: PG-13 Authors Note: Well, I took a little break from my own little 3EB challenge to collect my thoughts on where to go with the series. But I'm back. This is the 7th fic in the series, most of which can be found on my page. If they're not there now, they will be soon. It's Michael POV, and it takes place after Blind Date in the continuity. |
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| I miss her. There, I said it. Well, only to myself, but that's a big thing to
admit. I haven't seen her in at least a week. I had to stop counting the
minutes because I was driving myself crazy.
That day when I met her after school to have Izzy check her out, it was the
most excruciating moment of my life. I was so scared. Scared of being a
father, of being tied to this world, to Maria. But she needed me. I was the
one who helped her get into the situation, now I had to help her deal withit.
I held her hand, feeling the emotions come off her in waves. She was
petrified. But at the same time, I think the thought of having made a baby
together made her feel kind of special. Loved. When Isabel announced that she didn't feel anything there, both Maria and I were relieved. But I found myself fighting disappointment, too. It would have been a reason to let myself get involved fully in her life. And I realize now that I haven't seen her how much I really do want to be a part of her life. Have her be a part of mine. I saw the look in her eyes when she left that day. She was hurt because I didn't reach out to her after we knew. I did it on purpose. I wanted to push her away again, let her get on with her life now that she could. Why do I do that? I always push her away when all I really want to do is hold her. And now, it's like we don't even know each other. I really want to talk to her about everything. I know she needs to talk to someone, and there's no way she told Liz. I've been trying to track her down here and there, but I'm pretty sure she's avoiding me. So I've been focusing on other things. Like trying to find Nasedo. Isabel helped, but he didn't show. And Izzy swore she'd always be there for me, which I was happy to hear from someone, cause I'd never heard it before. But now that I think about it, and I find myself wanting to hear those words from someone specific. Whispered breathily in my ear from Maria's lips. Those luscious, lovely, pouty, perfect Maria DeLuca lips. I have never seen more sensual lips on any woman in my life. I'm pretty sure they're one of a kind. Just like Maria herself. I have to do something soon, to close this gap that's grown between us. I just don't want it there anymore. I don't know how she feels about it, but she used to want us to be close. I know, because she wouldn't have slept with me otherwise. Maria is many things, but promiscuous isn't one of them. She did it because she wanted me. Wanted us. I do too; I just didn't know it for sure until I threw it away. She's pushed me out of her life, and who could blame her? It's all I've ever done to her. It's going to be hard to make her understand, make her feel for me again. But I'm pretty sure at least part of her still wants me. Otherwise she wouldn't have to work so hard at hiding from me. I hate this feeling of missing her. Everyday that I don't speak to her, it pushes me farther away from her heart. But I won't let it go on for too much longer. I'll think of something to make her believe in me again. Believe in us. Because I can't stand this separation. She's farther from me everyday. But not for long. ~~~~~ Farther- Third Eye Blind Nothing much matters to me so I don't see why Farther from you every day Ohohhhh...There was a sound, yeah yeah, but I don't know how it goes, yeah yeah |
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