I'm not being fair. I know that. He just wants to protect me, and believe me, that's a big step for Michael. He's usually a stone wall (his words, not mine). But he had this nightmare last week. I could tell it had really shaken him up.

I know this pain
Why do lock yourself up in these chains?
No one Can change your life except for you
Don't ever let anyone step all over you
Just open your heart and your mind
Is it really fair to feel this way inside?

For the first two weeks after the whole vision fiasco, things were great. We were together. Like in public, you know? Not just the Eraser room. And, then, this nightmare.

And I can totally understand why Liz finally got fed up with Max. He pushed her away too many times. Obviously, Michael has taken some lessons from him.

He said that Nasedo had killed me in his nightmare. Gee, how positive.

He said we couldn't be together now because of that. He didn't want him to hurt me. He said I should do what Liz is doing and move on. Yeah. If it were that easy, don't you think I would have done it all ready? I mean, come on.

Some day somebody's gonna make you want to
Turn around and say goodbye
Until then baby are you going to let them
Hold you down and make you cry
Don't you know?
Don't you know things can change
Things'll go your way
If you hold on for one more day
Can you hold on for one more day
Things'll go your way
Hold on for one more day

I told him that too. That there was no way I could move on. He just looked at me. You know the way I mean. He just acted like if he didn't say anything, it wasn't true. That I hadn't gotten too intense, or whatever.

And then he walked away.

And I totally wish I could move on.

---

"Maria, this is what I've been telling you. Do you get it now?" Liz asked me. We were closing at the Crashdown, and I was, once again, complaining.

"But this is different, Liz. You knew Max loved you. Even when he pushed you away, it was for himself and Isabel and Michael. But this is different. He pushed me away to keep me safe. And--"

"Max told me that, too," Liz reminded me.

"But Max never had a nightmare where Nasedo killed you."

You could sustain
Or are you comfortable with the pain?
You've got no one to blame for your unhappiness
You got yourself into your own mess
Lettin' your worries pass you by
Don't you think it's worth your time
To change your mind?

"So what are you going to do?" she asked.

"Well, I figure, eventually, they'll find Nasedo, and they'll get their answers. If I'm lucky, he won't have a way to take them home. And then Nasedo will go away. And Michael can stop protecting me then."

"And you really believe that?"

"Yes!" I was defensive. After all, this was what was keeping me going. This little fantasy.

"Maria, you should take his advice. Because if what Isabel is telling me is true, things are going to get worse."

"What are you talking about?" I asked. Liz sighed.

"This girl... Tess. Isabel's worried she has a hidden agenda. "

"Has she said anything to anyone else?"

Liz shook her head. "Not even Michael. So, try to move on. It's better for you in the end."

"No, I can't do that, Liz. I tried that, do you remember?" I asked.

"Maria, you have to. Besides, it work for you in the end the way you want." I was interested in this theory.

"How do you figure?"

"Well, maybe Michael will get jealous and realize he doesn't want you with anyone else."

"Hmmm maybe."

Don't you know things can change
Things'll go your way
If you hold on for one more day, Yeah If you hold on
Mmm... If you hold on baby
Won't you tell me now
Hold on for one more day 'Cause
It's gonna go your way
Don't you know things can change
Things'll go your way
If you hold on for one more day, Yeah
Can't you change it this time

"Or maybe you'll find someone else."

"Liz that's never gonna happen."

"It could, Maria. And you know it could."

Make up your mind
Hold on Hold on
baby hold on... Turn around, Just turn around baby
Hold on for one more day, Cause
It's gonna go your way...