"I don’t know. it’s risky."

"Life is risky. I could die from the surgery but I might not. Without it I will most likely not live." Maria’s voice rose as she spoke. She knew the risks, she was scared too. But it seemed the only thing to do. "I want to live."

"I want you to live too baby. I love you, and I’m scared for you."

"I’m scared too," Maria said trying to fight down tears.

"Whatever you want, that’s what we’ll do."

"I want the surgery."

"Then that’s the answer," Amy said turning to the doctor.

Maria let go of Michael’s hand, which she had forgotten she was holding and got up to hug her mother.

The doctor shuffled through papers on his desk and Michael squirmed in his seat, both obviously uncomfortable at the show of affection between the women. Maria laughed and sat down next to Michael again.

The surgery date was planned and discussed. The doctor told them exactly what would happen in the OR. Maria felt more relaxed knowing what would happen to her. But still it was unsettling, she wanted it to be over with.

After everything was set Amy drove them home. Maria sat in back, her head on Michael’s shoulder. When they reached the De Luca’s driveway Maria stayed in the car with Michael.

"I’ll drive you home in a second," Maria told him. "But I just wanted to say thank you for coming today."

"No problem. Soon this whole thing will be behind us."

"Yup, one way or another. At least I know someone is there waiting for me if I die. Josh will take care of me."

"You’re not leaving me for him, now are you? No one but me is taking care of you, Maria De Luca. Nope, you’re staying right here."

"When did you get to be a softy, Michael "stonewall" Guerin?"

"Me, a softy?" both of them laughed. "I’ve change a lot since I met you. Especially the last two months."

"I’d say so," Maria couldn’t believe the changes he had gone through. She had always thought Michael was incapable of feelings, let alone expressing them. She wasn’t happy that he had had to go through her sickness but she was glad he now let himself love her. Maybe it was the good thing they said came out of bad experiences.

"Why? You miss the jerk I used to be?" Michael teased.

"Finally," Maria sighed and threw her hands up in mock surrender. "He admits it. Michael leaned over and tickled Maria until she cried for mercy.

"It’s good to hear you laugh again."

"It feels good to laugh, really laugh. Made me feel like I was a kid again, like I had no care in the world. Except I kinda lost my childhood the first time. So did you."

"Maybe we could find them again and live them now."

"Maybe," she agreed. Maria gave him a kiss then crawled between the front seats. She took the wheel and hit the gas.

"Woah, where you in such a hurry to get to?" Michael said, trying to keep his balance. Maria looked in the rearview mirror and laughed. "You eager to get rid of me?"

"No," Maria smiled. She pulled in front of the Crashdown, hopped out of the car and pulled open Michael’s door.

"You’re not working today, are you?" Michael looked concerned. Maria nodded her head.

"I just want to tell them the news."

"And how do you know "they’ll" be here?" Michael questioned.

"Cause where else would they be. We’re always here." Michael laughed and wrapped his arm around her waist. Maria smiled up at him, locking her gaze with his. She took a deep breath and grabbed the handle of the door to the Crashdown. As is swung open she heard the familiar sounds of the busy restaurant and smelled the everyday smells, it was comforting.

Maria saw her friends gathered at the counter. Liz was behind it so she saw her first. The rest of them turned around, all of them searching for an answer on Maria’s face. And looking at her friends Maria knew that no matter what the news had been, no matter what she told them they would support her.