FanFic - Other
"Questions, or Questioning Here"
Part 1
by Heidi
Disclaimer: Roswell and its characters belong to Jason Katims and Melinda Metz. No infringement on their creative genius is intended.
Summary: Their destinies have been fulfilled, but their questions are just beginning.
Category: Other
Rating: PG
For a long time there was just darkness and confusion: The first was a blessed release, but from what she could not remember. The second felt familiar, like she was accustomed to it long before coming here. Wherever "here" happened to be. Yet, the not knowing really didn't matter. "Here" was quiet and "here" was safer than anywhere she had been in a long time. So, she sat and enjoyed the quiet, even if it was confusing.

It was a long time, or at least it seemed a long time, before she actually thought about "time" and if it existed "here." Time was linked with light and dark, with night and day. But since she was in the dark all of the time "here", she had forgotten to think about it. Until she started to wonder about what had happened. She knew it had been important to her before "here." In fact, she was certain it had a big part in her being "here."

She knew the memories existed. Much like how her hand was there when she raised it to her face. The difficulty was that she couldn't see her hand in the dark of "here" even when she did raise it to her face. That led her to wonder, did she have a voice "here"?

She asked. "Do I have a voice here?"

"Here.here.here." She felt the words reverberate around her, ricocheting back and forth between "here" and.was there a "there"? It did not matter. She had the answer to her question.

Once the quiet settled comfortably around her again, she asked another question.

"What happened to me?"

This time the words landed with a thud at her feet and the dark of "here" shuddered. It asked if she really wanted to know.

"Yes, I want to know."

How simple those words were. How simple they were to say. But just how simple would the answer be?

A bullet of light exploded through the dark. It tore through the fabric of "here" with such a deafening roar she cowered and covered her ears with her hands. But nothing could shield her from the noise as more and more bullets pierced the air around her.

Her hands still clasped tightly to her ears, she watched as the beams of light expanded, their velocity now hindered by the weight of their growing size. Finally, they stopped. She stood up, and found herself surrounded by hundreds of flickering screens that began to play.

Millions of images flashed forth in rapid succession. She recognized what she saw: The sounds, the events, they were all part of her. And as she watched, the puzzle pieces started to fall into place and her memories returned: The running, the fear, her efforts to help, and finally, the fire. She remembered the fire that had surrounded her, the bright tendrils of flame licking her skin. She had thought her life was over then. Yet, how did she come to be here?

The screens faded into oblivion and everything was dark once more.

"Was that what you wanted, or do you regret it now?"

She spun around, eyes straining to match a shape to the voice that was not her own.

"It isn't that hard you know." The voice said to her again.

"What isn't that hard? Who are you? What do you want?" She cried out, the old fears creeping up into her throat again, threatening to suffocate her. Instead, the dark of "here", a living, breathing thing, crowded about her. It reminded her of the peace she had found "here" and told her of the strength she had within.

The comforting presence bewildered her. The thought that there might be another, a third, within the dark was upsetting. There was no way for her to determine if it was real or a product of lunacy. She decided it did not matter. She would trust the presence, whatever it may be.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk. What happened to all the fight in you? All I see now is a scared little mouse." The voice was scathing in its reprimand and it stirred the ashes of her anger.

She forced her body to relax and concentrated on the space surrounding her, preparing herself.

"Now, that is more like it."

With a flash of movement she turned and lashed out in the dark with a fist. She heard a grunt as her knuckles came into contact with flesh and she lashed out again with a kick of her leg. It met only air.

"Is that really how you should treat your guest?" the voice questioned her. She could see him, in her mind's eye, rubbing his jaw where her punch had made contact while he spoke to her. She wondered at his words. He was her guest? How was that possible? Did he know where they were? It did not matter. She would not answer him. She'd wait for him to speak again and betray his position.

"You have no reason to fear me here." The voice spoke so softly the sound wafted through the air. She could not tell from where it came.

"I'll never be okay again." She answered back and the sound of her voice startled her. She did not mean to speak aloud. Nor did she know why she had said what she did. If only there was some kind of light so she could see who came to torment her.

Answering her silent command, the air in front of her began to shimmer and dance. Gradually, like the sun cresting over a distant horizon, the midnight of "here" was chased away, and a ray of warm brilliance touched her feet. She basked in the feel of it as the warmth crept up her legs and to her arms and at last to shine on her face, blanketing her in its glory. For a moment, she forgot the light left her exposed.

Something moved to her left and the light was marred by elongated shadow of a man. She braced herself.

"Ah. This is much better. Don't you agree?" The man, like herself, was enjoying the newborn sun of "here." He turned his face away from the increasing light and looked toward her. She inhaled sharply with a hiss.

She hated his patronizing smile. She always had.

"Pierce." She spit out the word, distasteful as it was to her. "Did you find some further use for me then? Is that why I am here?"

There was a flickering of emotion in his eyes. Before she could name it, it was gone. He would not reveal anything to her unless he could gain more in return. They stood silently in the midst of a white nothingness.

"I won't help you. No matter what you do to me, I will not help you hurt them." Her voice was like steel.

Pierce laughed and when he spoke his voice was haughty. "Your usefulness was short lived. Even when you were important to my operation, you knew too little. Regardless, what has occurred in the meantime has surpassed my expectations, even though I regret it was without my direct intervention."

"What are you talking about?"

"Ask and ye shall receive." He said no more, but she saw the dare glinting in his eye.

"What happened to them? What happened after I left?"

While she spoke she searched the air above her, expecting to see some kind of projection device reveal itself in the light, something that would explain the screens from the first time. However, it was not until the screens reappeared, alive with images and sounds, that she realized she would find no such device. It no longer mattered. What was playing captured her full attention.

When the screens fell silent she felt her eyes burning. She let herself blink and felt the tears that had long been tracing paths down her cheeks. Quickly, she wiped them away with her hands, acutely aware of her audience. And as she did, she found herself studying the shiny liquid now spread across her palms while her mind absorbed what had been revealed.

She heard Pierce sigh where he stood, his eyes staring at the empty space where the screens had been. "My vision was too small. If I had only known then what I know now."

Her heart was heavy and his words added to her despair. "Why?" She questioned, her voice filled with emotion. "Was it not enough what you did to Max without playing with the rest of them too? And now, do you just want to gloat over me and show me how you've driven them apart with your little tricks, your illusions?"

She turned to him for an answer and saw he was lost in his own thoughts, deaf to her railing questions. "I didn't know there were four of them." He said absently. She was shocked at the tone of his voice. He sounded as if what they had just witnessed was new to him. But how could that be? Wasn't this his stage, his arena?

"I would have gotten it from him. All of it. If only I had him a little longer." Pierce turned and directed his attention to her. "I wasn't able to work with Max quite as long as I did with you. But I could see it. I could see the same look in his eyes that you had just before you broke. In a very practical way, you were good practice for me."

A slow smile spread over his lips and his eyes began to sparkle. He was remembering his white room, she had no doubt of that. Even though she tried to deny them, once her memories had returned, those days had returned as well. And with it, she recalled her amazement at how his eyes were always at odds with his face. Even when they were alive with excitement, even when he smiled as he was now, his eyes remained cold--cold and cruel. She had learned the hard way that there was no hope in pleading with a man with such eyes. She had tried once. She wouldn't again.

"Go to hell, Pierce."

She had not finished uttering the words when she felt the unknown presence return in a warm breeze that caressed her face. She could feel it. It was angry with Pierce and regretful it had been away so long. A glance at Pierce and the sudden change in his demeanor, and she could tell he felt it too. He actually looked afraid.

The tone of his voice betrayed him further. "I have been there. And now, shall you send me back so soon?"

The presence didn't wait any longer. It hurtled its way through the air toward her enemy. Pierce staggered on his feet from the force of its fury and his clothes whipped about him. The air surged and churned, trapping Pierce in the eye of its tornado. Strangely enough, the air about her was still and calm though the thoughts inside her mind closely resembled what was going on in front of her.

"Wait! Stop! I have to know!" She cried out, praying that whatever was there with them in this great void of space and time would listen to her.

The wind, which had now lifted Pierce several feet off the ground, suddenly died and he landed with a hard crash. With visible effort, he tried to lift himself up only to fall back on his hands and knees. For a while, he remained kneeling and tried to catch his breath, his head hanging loosely between his arms.

Dispassionately, she observed his disheveled hair and clothes and waited for him to be able speak. "What did you mean by that?"

He turned his head toward her, willing the muscles to lift his head to look up at where she was. "Mean by what?" he asked in return.

"What did you mean by you were called here?"

Repositioning himself, he placed a trembling hand on a knee and managed to stand.

She was impatient for answers. All her questions, everything that didn't matter before was now essential to her sanity.

"You called me here." He said simply as he straightened his tie and tried to smooth out the wrinkles in his dark suit.

"What are you talking about, Pierce? You brought me here. You set the hospital on fire and pulled me out just in time to let everyone else think I was dead. This is just another elaborate ruse to get what you want."

"The hospital was no more a trick than that alien throwing me against the wall and breaking my neck, Topolsky."

She flinched at his words and at the use of her name. It reminded her of the last time he had addressed her so: When agent had turned against agent and she was driven away in the back of an unmarked vehicle to her.her death?

"I don't understand. How could I have called you here? Where is 'here'?" Her voice rose with each word. The implications of what he said had begun to sink in and it terrified her.

The presence, still hovering over Pierce, sensed her anxiety and returned to her side, trying to whisper reassurances. It knew she was not yet ready to face her new reality. However, its efforts only confirmed what she feared and she would not be comforted.

"We always return to what we know, Topolsky. You always assumed I had all the answers, or that I'd figure them all out. You knew I wouldn't let anything hold me back from the truth. And so, somewhere in your subconscious you called me here because you wanted answers. You wanted to know and you thought I already did." He finished brushing off the cuff of his suit jacket then and met her eyes, his arrogance returning. "Ironically, I knew little more than you already did. Until you asked and gave us both the answers we were searching for."

Pierce sighed and shook his head at her. "Once, you were a great agent--instinctive, full of potential. What I see now doesn't even come to close to that." He ended his words with a sneer of disgust.

She opened her mouth to reply, but the presence next to her silently screamed at Pierce that he had done enough. It rushed toward him again. Topolsky shut her eyes and heard the rushing of wind and something like a distant gurgling. Then all was silent. Without opening her eyes, she knew he was gone.

She sat down and contemplated if it was better "here" when things were just dark and confusing. Wherever "here" was. She still didn't know the answer to that question. Yet, with everything that had already occurred, it didn't matter. There was already too much to think about. Instead, she merely wished for the dark to return. The air immediately complied, the same as before. It shifted and the sun of "here" sank and gave way to the night she desired.

Once again, it was safe and quiet "here." She felt her invisible protector return. It wrapped itself around her, telling her she was safe and loved. She accepted it, believed it, trusted in it. And as she let herself fall to sleep, something she had never done "here" previously, the image of two large powerful wings draping themselves over her came to mind.

Index