To: Max@scared.com
CC:Liz@stepback.org
CC:Mariade@wall.hit
CC:Isevans@hardshell.com
CC:MichaelG@think.mud

I know you sometimes must wonder, does Alex have a serious side? I promise the following will contain no jokes, puns, or labored humor. If I'm right, it's time we all did some serious thinking about what our lives revolve around. As I mentioned, Mr. Bunker inadvertently told me what's been wrong with us lately. He was talking about computer power supplies and how they had to have balanced positive and negative voltages. I've been looking for too scientific an explanation to the problems Max and I have been experiencing. I had been thinking the problem might be with an upset in the tiny electrical pulses that control our bodies.

I wasn't looking broadly enough at the picture. Anyone of us could have figured this out. Michael's body tried to protect itself when it thought it was out of balance. Max has been searching for balance. The more I look at it, the more I'm convinced that we're all a little out of balance. I believe it has to do with our experience healing Michael in the cave. At first I rejected this idea, thinking the stones and the circle could only affect Max, Michael and Isabel. I think, however, they can and have affected everyone. To have balance, there must be a center point...an unmovable point from which we form our realities...indeed our normals. Those normals can change...the center point cannot. I believe that when we brought Michael back...in our excitement over saving our friend...we stopped to soon. I think our central balance points were repositioned and now are stuck where they were that night. I for sure need to move mine and I think, perhaps, we all do. I could have sent this to each one of you separately, with just my observation on you...but I think, as we reevaluate, we need to know each other's strengths and weaknesses. Since we all can reference Michael, let me start there. His frame of reference...his balance point... has been to isolate himself...withdraw...never let anyone or anything close to him. When his body chemistry became upset, his body responded exactly the way his balance point told it to. His instincts said isolate...don't let anything near...hence the protective cocoon. We changed the balance point enough that night to subdue the natural instincts and let his mind take over again. Did we get it to what's right for him? I don't know...he's going to have to determine where it is and if it's what he wants.

As for me...consider where I was at psychologically that night. I was still not totally accepted as part of this group of people. I had just come through a time where I felt that my old friends were deserting me and I still wasn't sure where I fit with the expanded group. That was where my balance got frozen. In response, my senses reacted to assure myself that I would always know everything about everyone. Just as Michael's cocoon was an over reaction, so was the way a slight sensory power in me got so hyped up that I was suddenly seeing the life history of anyone I even glanced at. The kiss from Isabel isn't any electrical magic...it's a confirmation of acceptance. Once I feel accepted again, things return to normal. It became my point of balance...and I need it changed.

Max, my friend. I can't tell you how much of an appreciation I got for what your life is like as I did on the field trip. You keep telling us that life with you can't be normal. It took seeing just how difficult it was for you to act like a normal student on that trip to understand what you mean. I think I understand why you took the gamble of opening up a little to Liz and the others. If I had to do what you do without help, I think I'd crack. I also think I see why you can't seem to feel good about being with Liz...even though if there ever were two soul-mates, you guys are they. The night with Michael... your mindset was all about how normal Liz was making you feel. Even with all the emotion about Michael, you were still grasping at "normal". That's where your balance is frozen. It stuck in "normal". But your head tells you that you are not and can never be "normal". You life is at odds with your balance point. No amount of stepping back will fix that. Since your head says, " Liz makes you normal"... Liz and you can't be together. That situation is making you both miserable. You're not fighting being with Liz, you're fighting your balance point. Liz tells you she'll move to whatever normal you want to create. But, you can't see her doing that because you're balance point says she's already there. You keep moving away from normal because situations in your life say you have to...and the farther away you get from your balance point...the more your system reacts, eventually shutting down your power. The kiss from Liz...it just returns you closer to the balance point normal. You must move your balance point back to what your head says you need, not to what your emotions say you'd like it to be. And don't worry...Liz can move hers too...and I know she will. She loves you too much to do otherwise.

(You can't believe how long it took Alex to figure that out! He's not sure he completely understands it either.)

Liz, my almost sister...I think you know from reading about Max where you need to go. I think right now your balance point is stuck on, "is Max going to be OK". That's where you were that night in the cave and that's what your life is branching out from. Of course he's going to be OK...not "normal" perhaps...but OK. I think you need to re-balance on what you do best...keeping a cool head and being there for others. Build your life off that balance point like you used to. That will let you do what's best for you, Max and everyone else.

Maria, don't take this wrong but you're off balance too. You jumped in to help Michael, but you seemed to do it to some degree with the hope that your efforts would be garner you verbal appreciation. Your balance point right now is seeking verbal appreciation. Unfortunately your man's not very good when it comes to giving a verbal thank you. He shows appreciation in non-verbal ways, as I'm sure you've noticed. I suggest you concentrate on making your balance point something akin to seeing life as a mystery unfolding. That should allow plenty of room for education, excitement, and even romance.

And Isabel...I'm not going to presume anything about you. Since I've been around you a little more lately, I've decided that you may be the only person that wasn't thrown off-balance that night. That's because you reacted exactly the way you always have in a crisis. You did what you had to do. Of course, if you WANTED to change your balance point to something a little more people friendly I wouldn't mind a bit. I'm staying away from any recommendation...if this idea doesn't work, I can't have you so mad you wouldn't...well you know.

Well, that's the unscientific analysis from Alex the science guy. I only know one way we might do this. We've got to have a circle and use the stones. Michael, Max, Isabel...please don't think in suggesting this I'm being presumptive with what is really something of yours...but I think it's the only way. I also think we have to decide for ourselves where to set our balance points and be thinking about them when we do the ritual. I also think we can't tell each other exactly where we're setting our balance points. This would make them interact too much and upset the natural flow of things. Michael...since you seem to have the best relationship with Riverdog, would you see if he would let us use the cave and the stones again...assuming you're all in agreement. I know this sounds weird...but so was bringing Michael back to us this way. It's the only thing that makes sense to me now. Anyone want to try it?

Alex

PS
Maria, I'm not sure if Michael's computer is working yet. Could you make sure he sees this.

A