The strongest of us was the first to fall. He was so stupid, then. We were all stupid, not to shy away from the danger we could not see. It was one fight. One argument, one more misspoken word between close friends, partnered warriors, that had misspoken so many. The camp was tense with anger that night, immature annoyance and exasperation. A grumbling frustration that so soon changed to sorrow in his wake. He had to get himself killed, the fool. Saving no one, saving everyone. Heedless, headstrong as he had always been, determined to prove to all the others that he had been right. It never once occurred to him that for once, for possibly the first time in his mind, he had been wrong. I had refused to help him, that night. It never occurred to me that I was wrong, too. See we are stupid still. Stupid for loving, stupid for leaving, stupid for not forgiving when we should have, stupid for forgetting when we should have remembered. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

The princess fell next. It was her own fault. Her own web of past lies, of ancient treachery and deceit. It wasn’t us. It wasn’t our fault that she feared our rejection, it wasn’t our fault that she awaited our hatred. It wasn’t our fault that we turned away from her. She should have told us sooner. She should have told us when we could still forgive. She only got what she expected. We didn’t force her to work against us. We didn’t force her away. Furious silences and hardened jaws can’t do that. Clenched fists and turned backs don’t make a person leave. We didn’t force her to remember us. It wasn’t our fault she loved us still, no matter how cruel we had been, no matter how we hated her. We didn’t force her to die for us. She should have come back. It wasn’t our fault that we would not have accepted her. Stupid of her to have realized that, stupid of us to have not.

My brother died soon after that. Not my real brother, even. I wouldn’t have been related to him at all, if our horny parents could have stayed away from each other. I don’t remember how he died, not anymore. I don’t even remember why he was fighting. I remember that he died for me, that he insisted he wouldn’t, that he would use me as a shield against the enemy before he ever stuck his neck out for me. That I smelled like burnt toast, and that he hoped he didn’t see me in the next life. I remember that he muttered some irrelevant quote from some decaying philosopher to calm my hysterics right before he fell. I remember that I cried, and that my tears mixed with the blood on his shirt. I remember that we were together once more, the five of us that were left that we stood together for an instant over his broken body. I remember wondering why I had never told him that I had loved him. Stupid of me, to forget such an important thing. Stupid of him, to have not lived long enough to hear me say it.

My other brother – my soul brother - fell only days after that. Or were they moments? I remember how he died. I remember it all very clearly, from the smell of smoke as the last bits of rubble fell from the sky, to the high pitched laughter of a gleeful child. An evil child, who wasn’t really a child at all. I remember the way the building looked just like a dollhouse to me, with little white windows and a welcome mat on the porch. I remember the way the blackened window frames crunched beneath my feet as I sorted through glass and charcoal to find my friend. I remember that there was no blood. I just don’t remember why he died. Something about a misunderstanding. Something where we had all heard our information from different sources, where we no longer checked with one another, but simply assumed that we were of one mind. Assumed that we were together still. Stupid, for thinking we were invincible. Stupid, for not letting his death show us that we weren’t.

My best friend was the next victim. My only real friend left, my soul sister, the one dearest to me. She died saving a queen who only realized her true worth, her real strength, when she lay stretched bloody and mangled on a battlefield. A queen that wasn’t worth saving. Stupid sister, giving your life for someone so inferior. Stupid, for being so noble and brave, and always putting others first. Stupid, for leaving me here without you. Stupid queen, who could have died in your place. Who could have been the one to look so serene, so peaceful, and so riddled with bullets as the blood left her body. The queen who could have been the one we surrounded and cried over. Surrounded, as we had my equally noble and stupid brother. But we were not together. Not anymore. Stupid us for not seeing that there was still a together to be had.

Half an eternity after her death my last friend’s body fell. His soul had already died with hers. He was the only one to leave freely, the only one who had a choice. Stupid him, for taking the easy way out. Stupid king, for not seeing the people that needed you. Stupid universe, for giving him the power to heal. Stupid, for not realizing he could use the same power to kill. Stupid king, for leaving me here while you went with her. For letting me stay when you found your together. How could you? You were supposed to hold us together from the beginning. Stupid man, for letting your best friend go before you saw that he was gone. Stupid, for not saving everyone like we assumed you could. Stupid me, for believing too much of one king. Stupid, for not seeing that you didn’t even have the strength to save yourself.

The queen should have been distraught. I should have cried. Stupid us, for not knowing when to heal. She should have seen the bond that had already broken; she should have been the one to mend it. What good are powers if they don’t show you things like that? I shouldn’t have been the one to know to fix things. Stupid, for telling myself just that the morning before she died. Stupid her, for letting me think such a thing. Stupid for taking the gift my sister gave her, for taking it as though it was nothing and hurling it away. She should have cherished it, should have loved the gift and nurtured it. Stupid her, for letting life go so quickly. Stupid us, for letting together go even faster.