Oh, God. I hope I did the right thing. I haven't been sleeping since. I haven't been eating nor anything else. I've only been thinking about that night. I haven't seen her for seven days. I called the next day and she wouldn't come to the phone. Her mom said she was acting strange and it was better to leave her alone. I called again the next day and she still wasn't up to talking to me. I finally went to her house and she was out. No one knew where she was and I waited for two hours and then left. She wasn't with Jesse since I saw him on my way home and he was alone. I took the hint and decided to let her come to me.

Max is getting suspicious. He keeps asking me what's going on with his sister and If I know anything. Duh! Of course I know something, but I keep telling him that I have no clue. Man, is he gonna kill me when he finds out. I almost told him yesterday but I bit my tongue in the very last second. This is not only my secret to tell. I know I have to wait for her to come out when ready, if ever.

I don't think I can wait much longer. I want to talk to her. She left so suddenly. We never managed to clear things out between us.

"Michael!" Talking about clearing things out. "What?" Oh, just leave me alone, Max. "Isabel's here and wants to talk to you." That's another story. She's here? Great. Now if only Max would leave. "Hi, Iz." "Hey." She smiled. Ok, she smiled. But she doesn't look so good. I think she's really pale. "What's up?" That was Max. The nosy one. "Nothing," she glares at Max. She wants him to go, too. Fine, I'll ask him. "Max, would you." I gesture with my hands towards the door. "You mean leave?" "Yes." "Is there something I should know about?" "If there was, we wouldn't be asking for some privacy, would we?" "Isabel, is this about Jesse and you again?" Max just wouldn't drop the subject. "No, Max. Its' not." Isabel looks at her brother and then at me. She's leaning on the couch and suddenly I get this really weird feeling that her eyes are not focusing on either of us any more. In fact she's not focusing on anything and Max notices that, too. "Are you all right?" She turns her cloudy stare towards me "Michael." and passes out rolling over the couch. "Oh God, Isabel." We both run towards her and catch her just before she lands on the floor. Max is in panic. I am, too. I just don't say anything. We both struggle to wake her up, but she doesn't respond. "What's going on?" Max looks clueless at first but then recognizes the signs. He starts to undress her and I'm about to stop him as he gets rid of her sweater, but then he reaches under her shirt, feels her stomach and after a couple of seconds gasps, "she's pregnant."

She's. she's. Pregnant. Isabel's pregnant. That's why she wouldn't talk to me. That's why she wouldn't confront me. Now I understand. Now I know. I don't think I clearly realize what this means. I need some time. A couple of seconds will have to do. At least until she wakes up.

"Iz, can you hear me?" She's slowly coming to. Ok. I can do this. I can do this. It will be fine. She's aware and immediately wants to sit up. "No," Max pushes her down, and she turns to look at him and then at me. I think she knows I know 'cause she bursts out crying the second our eyes break apart. I try to give her a comforting look and Max holds her hand. "Isabel, we know." She's sobbing even more now and my heart is breaking while I watch her. I finally reach towards her and she pulls me into a hug. She's holding me so close that I can hardly breath but I wouldn't let her go even if I stopped breathing ten minutes ago. "Have you told Jesse?" Max always wants to have everything under control. I wonder how he's going to handle this one. "No. Jesse doesn't need to know any of this." She's getting some color back to her face. I'm still sort of holding her while Max continues his inquisition. "What? Last month you wanted to tell him about us and now you're not telling him you're having his baby?" "It's not his baby," she replies. Here we go. Max almost falls out of his chair while I'm waiting for the bomb to drop. "Who's the father, then?" At that moment my mouth opens all by itself. "I am."

Yes. We made love. Isabel and I made love that night. I couldn't let her go after she assured me Jesse was the one person she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. I couldn't let her get away from me. You can call me selfish, but I love her. I've always loved her and now it's even stronger. I can't live without her being an important part of my life. It took me a long time to admit that to myself, but I did it. And I told her I wanted to be with her forever. I knew she wanted to be with me, I just wasn't sure she was going to let me in anymore. I've hurt her so many times. I wanted to do something right for a change.

So I kissed her. It was a gentle kiss on the lips and she returned it. It was nothing big, really. It was just, I don't know. When we broke apart, she looked at me for a long time and then asked, "did you mean what you said before, Michael?" "Every word of it," I replied and then she kissed me. It was not so innocent any more. It was, I could say, more than a passionate kiss. We sort of clung to one another and were sucking breath out of each other until both our lips were swollen and our necks were full of love bites that turned into huge hickeys the next morning.

She's got a gorgeous body. I've always known that, I just didn't allow myself to think that way before. And now when I did, I couldn't stop myself from touching her. I would've done it in a second if she had given me any kind of sign that she wanted me to stop, but she hadn't, she even encouraged me, so I didn't stop.

We took things slow and I really didn't expect us to get that far that night but it felt right and she wanted it as badly as me. It was the only natural thing for us to do and when I was moving inside her, listening to her soft moans, I wondered how I could've been so blind all this time. She was always there and I never made a move before. It hit me to the bottom of my heart that she was ready to give her precious gift to me, Michael Guerin, and I was sorry I couldn't offer her the same thing. She said she didn't mind and that she understood, so we dropped the subject. I know this wasn't exactly fair to Maria, but my heart was telling me that I had made the right choice.

Everything was perfect, I've never had a better intimate experience before and she fell asleep in my arms afterwards. I don't know how she managed to sneak away, but when I woke up in the morning, she and every sign of us spending the night together, was gone.

"You?!" To say that Max is surprised is a huge understatement. His face says shock all around and he asks, "You had sex with her?" That's a very nice and direct way to put this. "Yes," I answer simply while Isabel is clutching her face to a pillow on the sofa and squeezing both of my hands. She is terrified and we all know why. Our baby has no future on Earth and we don't have a way home. We're stuck here for good and Isabel's pregnant. Max's eyes are shooting fireballs at me. "How could you do this to her?!! You endangered her life!" Don't you think I know this? I'm fully aware of the consequences. I wish I was able to go back in time and change it. I should have let her walk away that night. I should've let her go. "I don't remember yelling at you when you got Tess pregnant, Max, so stop it. You're not helping a bit." "That was different." "How? How was it different, besides that you didn't love her the way I love Isabel?" "You don't know the first thing about my relationship with. wait, did you say you loved Isabel?" "Yes, I did. But you still didn't answer me. How was it different then?" "We didn't know a lot of things. We had no idea this atmosphere is going to be dangerous for the baby. We didn't know." Max's voice breaks and Isabel and me both wait for him to compose himself and secretly wipe a tear from his cheek. "The point is," he continues after a while, "that I made a mistake. A big mistake. But that doesn't mean that you should go ahead and repeat it. Not when you could've prevented it."

I just stare at him and so is Isabel. I know he's right. But our intel was incomplete as well. We thought of this possibility and took precautions, but.it didn't work. "If you had to do it, you could've at least used something," Max makes an accusation again. "We did," Iz speaks up, ready to defend our actions and I give her a 'don't give him too much of information' look. "You did?" "Yes. But I got pregnant anyway. Human birth control sucks." She's got that right. I was happy that I had a pack of condoms when I realized we were going to go all the way. I was sure there was no way she could get pregnant if we used one. Two, to be exact. We did it twice. Anyway, looks like we were wrong. It wasn't enough. Oh, God. What are we going to do?

"Ok, what's done, is done." Max finally realizes there's no way his yelling and reproaches will make the baby disappear. "Isabel, how long have you been pregnant?" "Today is day eight." "Eight, all right. If alien pregnancies take about a month that means you're still in the first trimester. You should, by human standards, be about two and a half months pregnant, to be exact." "Ok, so?" "So, if we're going to do anything, we should do it fast." "What did you have in mind," I ask suspiciously. "Well," he turns towards me and whispers, "you agree that we have to put her well-being in front of the baby's, right? I mean, we can't afford to lose her." "No, but.." I try to think clearly when Isabel jumps into my sentence. "No!!! I won't let this baby die without a fight. I know what you're thinking, Max. I'm not getting an abortion." "Isabel, listen," Max crouches next to her and wipes the sweat off her face, "look at yourself. You're not able to bear this baby let alone keep it alive. It's not your fault. You can't do anything to help it. It's not meant to be. You have to save your own life, Iz." "No. No. I'm not doing this. You can't make me. It's my body and If I chose to die for this baby, I will."

She's getting hysterical and I feel so helpless. This situation looks hopeless. I can't suggest to her to kill our own baby. But I also can't allow her to die for it. I can't lose her. She's my life. What am I to do? I only know that I have to talk to her. We haven't talked for a week and what was happening in the last half an hour is not considered talking to my girlfriend, especially because Max did half of it. My head will explode any minute now. I need to do something.

"Max, would you please leave Isabel and me alone for a while?" "But Michael." "I want to talk her. You inflicting your decisions to her is not doing any good at this time." "Fine. I'll go for a walk to clear my head for a while."

Max left more than five minutes ago and neither Isabel nor I said a thing for all this time. We're sitting on the couch, hugging and trying to console each other. It's not working very well. Her sobs are getting out of control. I feel that I have to be the one to break the silence.

"Why didn't you tell me when you found out?" "I wanted to, but I needed some time. I was scared. So scared. And I still am." "I'm sorry, Iz. I'm so sorry that I put you into this position." "It was my choice, too, remember? It's not like you forced me." "I know. But it doesn't make me feel any better. I shouldn't have.." "Do you regret pursuing our relationship?" "No. I love you." "And I love you." That was the first time she said it to me. Last week she only said 'me too' and it probably meant the same, but this one is for real. Oh man, what am I thinking? She's not safe with me. I spend one night with her, we use birth control, and I get her pregnant. She would be better off with a human. Larek said that human and alien cells usually don't mix very well, so it would be safe to presume.

"A penny for your thoughts," she makes me come back to reality and looks at me with raised eyebrows. "It's nothing, really." "No, you were thinking about something. Tell me." I stiff and try to avoid her gaze. It doesn't take her long to put the pieces together. "You're thinking about leaving me, aren't you?" I flinch as her words cut trough my heart. "Isabel, I won't leave you. I was just thinking that what happened between us wasn't safe for you and it still isn't. What are we going to do? And even if we worked things out, what would happen the next time we make love? I wanna be with you more than anything but." "Then be with me. No buts. We'll find a way, Michael." "What about the baby?" "You don't want me to get rid of it, do you?" "No, I could never tell you to do that, but I have to tell you this. If it comes to choosing between your life and the life of the baby, I'd chose yours in a matter of a second." "How can you say that? Don't you want it?" "Of course I do. But I want you more. Much more. You're everything to me. And I'd love for us to have a child, but you saw what happened to Max's." "No! Don't say that. Our child will be fine. It will live. It will live. We'll rock it and sing lullabies to it and watch it grow up and..." "Isabel, I don't want you to get hurt, but I'll tell you what, if you decide to keep this child and it dies, it will be even harder. For both of us." "I know. But what if everything is fine?" "Then, why did you trip over the couch before and lost consciousness for a few minutes? You scared the hell out of me." "I don't know. I don't know what's happening, but I can feel that this baby is a fighter. It won't give up. And neither will we. Right, Michael?" "Right. We'll get through this together."

And we did. It was a hell of a month. We were scared to death and were waiting for something unpredictable to happen, but nothing did. Max and me connected to the baby and it seemed fine. No stress, no nothing. It just grew. But not as fast as we had expected. There was no way Isabel would give birth in one month time. She wasn't even any bigger, but the baby was definitely there, so we predicted that her pregnancy was not an alien one but more like a human one with slight discrepancies. I have no idea why. But thank God for little things.

She has a human body and so do I. So, why would our child have to be an alien? It's a hybrid, just like us. And it's not an 'it' any more. It's a 'she'. A baby girl. A tiny baby girl. We were thrilled when we found out. Isabel and me. We've been very close for the last year and the baby only brought us closer. And I don't just mean the physical thing. That too, of course, but it's also the psychical stuff. We're in harmony with each other and can't wait for our daughter to be born.

We made a plan. Max and Liz promised to help when we take Isabel to the hospital. I'll be with her the whole time helping her and easing her pain while Max will be switching the blood tests and every other suspicious things. Liz, who is four months pregnant with Max (her parents are not exactly thrilled but are coping; looks like human and alien cells do mix after all) volunteered to give her blood to switch with Isabel's and help create a diversion if necessary. I would've asked Maria to help, but she's still not exactly speaking to me unless it's regarding work. I don't blame her. I think she's beginning to understand but it will take time for her to talk to me again.

Five more weeks. Not everything will go smoothly, I'm pretty sure of that. But we'll make it. We always do. And then it will be as Isabel said. We'll be singing lullabies to our baby and watch her grow. I'll be rocking her to sleep. I'll be rocking both of my precious girls. I'll finally have a family.