I know its Max.

I want to yell and answer him, almost gleeful to see that he would see me like this; after all he is done… after Her. I hear him call my name but my mouth refused to open and work. Frustrated, I try to move only to find myself routed in place. I hear him walk further into the room and his cry when he finally can see my bloody legs.

His worried face comes into view and his words are too soft to my ears, too slurred together. He is checking my pulse, his eyes sad. I feel joy rush in my heart, the first feeling there since I heard they slept together. I feel sickened at myself, somewhere, at the thought of being happy when Max was in pain, being happy that he can be here to see me fade away.

I can feel my heart start to beat faster, and a rush of panic fills me. No! I want to scream at him, tell him I wish to die rather than live on with his betrayal…

My eyes start to come in focus, as does Max’s rushed words. He’s repeating my name, and my eyes travel over the still bathed floor. He’s picking me up, and cleaning me off, telling me how he just healed me, and it was all going to be okay.

He didn’t know I wanted to die, I kept it hidden from everyone. I have for a while now, ever since I found out he’s been with her. I heard him talking that day with Michael, and have avoided him ever since. He violated us… everything…

I didn’t feel the strength to live. My savoir, my hero…. The only person I would gladly die for and owe my LIFE too… He took my life away with those words. Just by being with her.

He’ll be leaving me soon, this I know. Tears well up in my eyes, and I realize what I have become. I enjoyed the pain I had been suffering, at the edge of death. I can hear him talk to me how he needs to take care of whoever killed Alex, and I wonder how he could just progress onto such a topic after I almost died… again. Didn’t it look like I tried to kill myself?

I hear him now, explaining about HER. She needs to go home, she’ll die, she isn’t to blame... My eyes darken at the very thought, and my eyes travel back to the bathroom. Where was my Max? The one who used to love me so? Now he puts her in front of EVERYONE.

Laughing, I see his confused face. I won’t help him. I just want to be left alone, doesn’t he understand? I hear myself talking, but I know no sense of what it is. And when the tears clear my eyes I can see his face, shocked and surprised.

“Leave the hunter, Max. You obviously don’t care about any of us. Take Tess and go; leave us here to die. What’s the difference between what I am now and what I will be then?”

I stand up, shakily, and shake off his hands. I didn’t want his help. Walking over to the bathroom I smiled. “You know, Max? This reminds me of a song. How did it go…? Oh yeah! ‘I’ll kill you, but I’ll love you forever.’ … Kind of wrong in our situation, no?” Smiling at the irony, I walk into the bathroom, quickly locking the door. I can hear him start to move, finally realizing all my words.

I couldn’t stand to smile. Quickly, I grab the bloodied razor. Just down that vein in my wrist, right?