#112 Into The Woods – Transcript

Added by Mike

(Episode starts with a scene of two people making out in the back of a truck in the woods. There is a lot of lightning flashing in the sky, along with a bright white light)
(Scene switches to the Crashdown, where the lights die off for a brief instant due to the lightning storm outside. Liz has a cold and is taking some echinacea to combat it)
Voiceover: I hate the start of a cold. That little tickle that tells you something’s about to happen that you know you can’t prevent, something that could be mild if you do all the right things, or could knock you off your feet if you’re not careful.
Liz: You’re late.
Maria: Liz, today is the first day of the rest of our lives.
Liz: Spending time with your mother again?
Maria: No, I mean it. Aren’t you tired of being a slave to men?
Liz: Definitely your mom.
Maria: Tired of spending every waking moment pining over them, just for us to get our hearts crushed in the end. It is time to branch out, to explore other possibilities. You and me babe, together.
(Maria opens up her uniform to reveal a navel ring)
Liz: Maria, what are you…
Maria: Ta-da!
Liz: Oh, my God!
Maria: We are turning over a new leaf. We are enjoying our wild and crazy years to the fullest. You know, having fun for a change.
Liz: Yeah, but skewering my navel is not exactly my idea of fun.
Maria: Yeah, relax, honey. You think I’d let anyone get near me with a needle?
(Liz sneezes)
Maria: You still pumping that echinacea I gave you?
Liz: Yes, like 4 times a day.
Jeff: Hey, could one of you give me a hand over here?
Liz: Sure.
(Liz walks up to her father wearing Maria’s fake ring on her nose)
Jeff: Oh, my god!
Liz: Don’t worry, dad, it’s fake.
Jeff: Anything else I should know, a tattoo, maybe, uh…
Liz: No. Nothing.
Jeff: You’ve been so busy with school and new friends, I mean, we don’t even get a chance to talk.
Liz: I know, dad.
Jeff: We could make up for it this weekend.
Liz: This weekend?
Jeff: Isn’t that the fathers’ camping weekend? I saw it listed on your school calendar.
Liz: Yeah right, it is this weekend. You’re right.
Jeff: You still want to go, don’t you?
Liz: Yeah…yeah, dad, I would–I do want to go. It’s just that, you know, not that many people I know are actually gonna be going. Because they’ve sort of, like, outgrown it.
Jeff: Oh. Is that how you feel?
(Milton enters the Crashdown looking very excited)
Milton: Where’s Max Evans?
Maria: I thought he worked for you, dude.
Milton: You…you’re Max’s girlfriend, right?
Jeff: She is?
Liz: No, no, not really.
Milton: I have to find him.
Liz: Why? What’s going on?
Milton: Just everything we’ve been waiting our entire lives for. There’s been a sighting.
(Opening credits)

(At the UFO Museum, Milton is briefing Max on the sighting)
Milton: It was here, out in Frazier Woods. A close encounter. How many of us can say we’ve had that?
Max: How’d you find out?
Milton: Police scanner. You can never trust the law to share information.
Max: Well, who reported it?
Milton: Some hiker named Buzz.
Max: So it could all just be a hoax.
Milton: Oh, no, it’s real all right. There’s corroboration. Uh, 2 motorists, a family that was camping, and a fly fisherman by the name of Rocky Calhoun. I’ve seen a lot of hoaxes, Evans. I can smell them a mile away. This is no hoax.
Max: Frazier woods is a big place.
Milton: Not when you know where the cops are looking.
Max: Near the Indian reservation, huh? What exactly did these witnesses see?
(The Sheriff is interrogating Rocky Calhoun, one of the people who reported the sighting)
Rocky: A flash of light.
Valenti: Can you describe it in any more detail?
Rocky: Nope.
Valenti: Well, how big was it? Did it have a color? How long did it last?
Rocky: Listen, I ain’t one of those nuts that sees spacemen coming out from behind every tree.
Valenti: Of course not.
Rocky: You know what they do with those people? They lock them up tight in the looney bin.
Valenti: You don’t have to worry about that, Rocky. You mind if I call you Rocky?
Rocky: Everyone does. Look, Sheriff, there’s been dry lightning all over these woods for days.
Valenti: Did this look like dry lightning to you, Rocky? All right. Let me turn this off. Ok…now it’s just between you and me, ok, Rocky? You just tell me what you saw, from the beginning to the end, and I swear on my badge, no one will ever have to know.
Rocky: It was a white-hot light, kind of like an x-ray.
(Maria is walking through the hallways at school and several Guys are noticing her)
Guy: Hey Maria!
Guy: Whoa!
Guy: Whoa, check it out, man!
Guy: Hey hey, Maria!
Maria: It’s an aqua bra. You know, all the fun of implants except without the invasive surgery part.
Liz: You have officially lost it.
Maria: No, I have found it, babe, ok? I’ve had 3 phone numbers. It’s only second period.
Liz: What?
Maria: Yes.
Neil: Hey, Maria.
Maria: Hey, Neil.
Maria: Do you see what I’m saying? Ok, do you want to try this thing on?
Liz: I don’t know, I…who’s Max meeting in the eraser room?
Maria: Ixnay on the ining-pay, remember?
Liz: No, I am not pining. I’m just…I am just curious, that’s all. I hate not knowing what’s going on with Max.
Maria: His decision, if I recall.
(Liz and Maria see Michael enter the eraser room)
Maria: No wonder he couldn’t make a commitment.
Alex: Ok, I give up. What are we staring at?
Liz: This is an aqua bra. Would you like to try it on, Alex?
Alex: Yeah, maybe later. Here, have a flier. If I pass out enough of them, then I could raise my P.E. grade from a “C” to a “B-“.
Liz: Oh. Ooh, father camping weekend? I don’t suppose either of you would be…
Alex: Did I mention that I’m not very athletic, except for dodgeball?
Maria: No dad!
Liz: I hope mine has finally outgrown it.
(Alex sees Isabel by herself at her locker)
Alex: Oh, gee, look at the time. I gotta go. I’ll see you Guys.
Liz: Oh.
Maria: Like a puppy in heat.
Liz: I know.
Maria: He is my next project.
Alex: Hey, are you, uh, walking this way?
Isabel: Actually, I’m walking this way.
Alex: This way works for me. How’s it going?
Isabel: It’s going fine, Alex.
Alex: Great, great. So, movies.
Isabel: Movies?
Alex: Yeah, I was wondering if, uh, do aliens enjoy cinema?
Isabel: Alex…
Alex: Yeah, right, sorry. The “a” word. Anyways, there’s this, uh, Fellini retrospective at the art house theater this Friday night, and I wanted to know if maybe you wanted to, uh, go?
Isabel: No, I’m not really into that.
Alex: Ok.
Isabel: You want to just see a regular movie instead?
Alex: Yeah. That’d be great.
Isabel: Ok. See you later, Alex.
Alex: Yeah, whatever you say.
(Isabel goes into the eraser room)
Isabel: Can’t believe I’m in the eraser room with you two.
Max: We need a safe place to talk. So I found out a lot about the sighting from Milton.
Michael: Told you that place would get to you.
Max: 5 people saw a big flash in Frazier Woods.
Isabel: 5 basket cases.
Max: Then why has Valenti already closed off a 4-square-mile area of the forest near the Indian reservation?
Michael: You mean near the cave?
Isabel: Max, you don’t think this sighting…
Max: It was no coincidence. We need to get there before Valenti does in case there’s something to find.
Isabel: Yeah, but we don’t know how many Guys he has patrolling. If anybody saw us, then it would just make him more curious.
Max: What do you do in Frazier Woods?
Isabel: You hike, you fish, you camp out.
Max: I can’t believe I’m actually gonna suggest this, but we could go on that camping trip this weekend.
Michael: You’re kidding me, right?
Isabel: If anybody found us, we would just be kids missing from our school group.
Max: There’s only one problem. It’s a…it’s a fathers’ weekend. Get to know your dad kind of thing.
Michael: Guess that lets me out, huh?
(Mr. Parker is looking for Liz and enters her room)
Jeff: Hey, sweetie? You in here? Hey, now!
(Liz comes out from the bathroom semi-dressed)
Liz: Oh, dad!
Jeff: Oh, gosh. Oh, I should have knocked.
Liz: No, it’s all right, it’s ok.
Jeff: I gotta get better at this privacy thing.
Liz: It’s no big deal, dad. Did, um, did you want something?
Jeff: Uh, listen, sweetie, about this camping weekend. We should just go and take advantage of the time together. I wouldn’t miss that for anything.
Liz: I was actually gonna say the same thing.
Jeff: And I can get to know that Guy Max you’ve been hanging out with and, uh, he has a sister, too, right?
Liz: Isabel.
Jeff: And the Guy with the hair?
Liz: Michael.
Jeff: Michael, yeah.
Liz: Yeah, but I really doubt they’re even going.
Jeff: Oh. Well, I guess some fathers just aren’t as involved in their kids’ lives. Well, tHanks.
Liz: Sure, dad.
(Hank and Michael are having another argument)
Michael: There’s no milk!
Hank: Use beer! I thought I told you to wash the dishes.
Michael: Hey, I’m eating dinner.
Hank: Oh, that’s what you call dinner?
Michael: Yeah, like you care.
Hank: What did you say?
(Michael loudly knocks over some garbage)
Camper: Keep it down!
Michael: Hey, you, shut up!
(River Dog appears from the darkness)
Michael: Hey, wait! What are you doing here?
River Dog: Did you see it?
Michael: What are you talking about?
River Dog: Did any of you see it?
Michael: See what?
River Dog: It was real.
Michael: Would you quit talking in riddles? What was…the sighting. How do you know?
River Dog: I’ve seen it before.
(At the Crashdown, Liz is bringing camping gear down the stairs)
Maria: Running away from home?
Liz: Maria, I am begging you for mercy. Please come with me.
Maria: Dude, I told you, my idea of the great outdoors is rolling the windows down in my car on the way to the mall. Come on, I love your dad. You love your dad.
Liz: Yes, I do. I love him, but, like, in the normal father role. Which is like 5 minutes at a time, just a few times a day…not for an entire weekend with no TV.
Maria: Yeah. I’ve always found fathers grossly overrated myself.
Liz: And, you know, he has been getting so nosy lately. It’s like he wants to know like every single detail of my life. He even asked me about Max and Michael and Isabel.
Maria: Mmm, no. That’s why me and my mom have the “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy.
Liz: I’ll pay you.
Maria: How much?
Liz: 25 bucks.
Maria: $100.
Liz: Uh, $50.
Maria: $75.
Liz: $62.50.
Maria: How do you do that math so quickly?!
Liz: Ok, $62.50 and then I’ll do your math homework for an entire week.
Maria: You’re good.
(Liz sneezes)
Maria: Ooh. Hey, I brought you some more echinacea and threw in a little goldenseal, too.
Liz: The bus leaves at 5:00.
(Mr. Parker sees Liz paying Maria some money in exchange for a bag of what looks like drugs)
Liz: Hey, dad.
Jeff: Hey.
(At the sheriff station)
Hanson: Here’s your root beer, son.
Kyle: Hanson, I’m 16.
Hanson: I’m sorry. Here’s your root beer, sir. You sure you want to wait?
Kyle: He knows we’ve got to get a new tent. He told me to meet him here like 15 minutes ago.
Hanson: Well, it’s been crazy around here. You know, the sighting. He is a walking bundle of stress.
Kyle: That’s my dad.
Valenti: Hanson! Coffee. That son of a bitch hiker. He spilled his guts to the Roswell Gazette. USA Today picked it up off the wire. Now Rocky’s negotiating with Dateline.
Valenti: Hey, Kyle.
Hanson: I guess that means you won’t be returning Agent Stephens’ call first thing?
Valenti: Get Miller on the phone. Tell him to rush the search. I want every inch of that woods combed before Agent Stephens sends his feebee goons out there.
Valenti: Shouldn’t you be in school or something?
Kyle: I have third period free, remember? We have exactly 36 minutes to buy this tent, unless something more important has come up.
Valenti: Oh. Listen, Kyle, about this weekend…
Kyle: You mean fathers’ weekend, dad? The only 2 days in a row we spend together all year?
Valenti: Yeah. You know, I wouldn’t do this if it wasn’t an emergency.
Kyle: It’s an emergency. Well, come on, you can tell me. I’m family, right? Is it the big invasion?
Hanson: Mayor Higgins on the line, sir.
Valenti: I’ll be right there. Look, Kyle, I don’t know what this is yet, but I can’t have anybody else find out first.
Kyle: You can’t or you won’t?
Valenti: I tell you what. You go on ahead without me. I’ll call Coach Clay. I’ll make sure he takes care of you out there.
Kyle: THanks for your effort. See you on Monday.
(Kyle leaves dejectedly)
(Michael, Max, and Isabel are discussing what to do at the Crashdown)
Max: So River Dog saw the light?
Michael: The dog himself.
Isabel: And he said it was real? You know what this could mean?
Max: Our first real proof. Could even lead to actual contact.
Michael: If we haven’t had it already.
Max: What do you mean?
Michael: Why is River Dog following me? Why does he care?
Isabel: Because he knew the fourth alien.
Michael; Yeah, that’s what he said.
Max: And you don’t believe him?
Michael: How does he know so much? I mean, how did he know to heal me when I was sick? I mean, that’s some memory from when he was a kid. And where did he get those stones from? Maybe River Dog’s the Guy we’ve been looking for all along.
Max: The fourth alien?
Michael: I think he’s our father, Maxwell.
Isabel: Michael, I don’t think so.
Michael: Why, because you and Max already have one?
Isabel: No, that’s not what I’m trying to say…
Michael: River Dog knows more about us than Philip Evans ever will, no matter how many camping trips you Guys take.
(Alex is talking with Liz and Maria at the Crashdown, asking them if Isabel is glancing over at him)
Alex: Ok, ok, ok, is she looking at me?
Liz: Oh. Um…she’s not…she’s not really looking at you.
Alex: Isabel Evans and Alex Charles Whitman out on a date? That’s like so miraculous, you know. This is the biggest moment of Alex Charles Whitman’s life.
Liz: Listen, why don’t you just take some deep breaths, ok?
Alex: It’s just…it’s amazing, you know? I…it’s totally amazing. It’s…it’s too amazing. Oh, God! It’s a joke, isn’t it? It’s a practical joke. You two are in on it. You bastards.
Liz: Alex, Alex, Alex, um, your paranoid schizophrenia, it’s kicking in.
Alex: Right. I’m gonna go to the bathroom and go have a little talk with myself.
Liz: Ok.
Maria: See what I’m saying? These Czechoslovakians have way too weird of an effect on us. And if you don’t stay away from them, Liz, I’m gonna be picking up the pieces of your heart for the rest of your life.
Liz: No, you’re not, because I am staying away from him, Maria. Max and I haven’t even talked to each other for days.
Maria: Really?
Liz: Yes.
Maria: Then why has he been staring at you since he came in?
Liz: He has?
Maria: Am I gonna have to do an intervention with you? Liz, make him think that you are over him, that your life is so exciting. Lie if you have to. It’s for your own good.
Max: Hey.
Liz: Hey.
Max: Um, tHanks. Haven’t seen you in a couple of days.
Liz: I…uh, it’s been kind of busy.
Maria: She means she’s been kind of busy. Actually, we’ve both been kind of busy.
Michael: Yeah, I can see that.
Maria: You know, getting ready for the big weekend and all.
Max: You have a big weekend?
Maria: Dates. We have dates. With men.
Michael: Men?
Maria: These college Guys that we met during winter break and, um, they’re taking us out for dinner…an expensive dinner.
Max: Great. Well, have a good time.
(Max and Michael leave)
Liz: Maria, look, I know that you’re just trying to, you know, be helpful and everything but I…
Maria: But nothing. Liz, trust me. It’s for your own good. Ok?
Liz: Yeah.
(Liz and Maria see Alex go over to Isabel’s booth)
Maria: Oh, great.
Alex: So, Isabel…
Maria: Another one being sucked into the alien abyss.
Alex: Listen, about our plans for tonight…
Isabel: Oh, god, Alex, I’m so sorry. My dad is insisting we go on this lame camping trip together. I…I have to cancel.
Alex: Cancel?
Isabel: Yeah, I’m really sorry.
Alex: No, no, no, no, no. Not at all. Don’t worry about it. It’s funny, because I was just about to tell you that I was gonna have to cancel because of this fathers’ camping weekend fiesta. I mean, you know how dads can be sometimes.
Isabel: You’re going camping?
Alex: Some coincidence, huh?
Isabel: Huh.
(At the school parking lot, everyone is getting ready for the camping trip)
Alex: Pops! Yeah, let me go get my dad and then get the tags for that. Pops! Hey, I’m glad you could make it on such short notice.
Alex’s Dad: You sure you wanna do this, Alex?
Alex: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m sure. Come on.
Alex’s Dad: But we’re not really prepared.
Alex: Oh, our parkas, 2 sleeping bags, the wind at our backs…what else do we need?
Phillip: Are you sure you Guys really want to do this?
Max: We’ve been looking forward to it.
Isabel: Yeah, absolutely.
Isabel: Mosquitoes, pit toilets, and animal droppings. Yes!
Phillip: Well, I can’t say it doesn’t make me happy to see you two joining in like this.
Isabel: Well, that’s our new policy, dad. We’re joiners. Right, Max?
Max: Joiners.
Jeff: Maria, I am so glad you’re gonna come with us.
Liz: Yeah, me, too.
Jeff: Because there’s something that I think we should all talk about, and it’ll be good to get away from all the outside influences that you’ve been…
Liz: Oh, my God! Oh, God!
Jeff: …distracted by. What the…
Liz: Oh, my God! Maria, what am I gonna do? He’s here.
Maria: Ok, no problem. Let’s just, um, let’s tell them that the 2 college Guys had midterms, and we’re gonna meet them next week in Albuquerque.
Liz: Maria, having a life is one thing, but having a whole fantasy life is just a little bit troubling, don’t you think?
Coach: Bennett, Butler. Hey, Valenti.
Kyle: Hey, Coach.
Coach: I understand we’re gonna be bunking together this trip.
Kyle: Pinch me.
Valenti: I’ll take it from here, Coach.
Valenti: New tent, right?
Kyle: Right.
Kyle: So, I thought you had to work.
Valenti: Oh, they’ll get a hold of me if they need to. I’ll go check us in.
Valenti: Hey. Squeezed another year out of it, huh?
Jeff: Oh, yeah. You know, you’re lucky you got a boy.
Alex’s Dad: Hello, Sheriff.
Valenti: Hey. Jim. This weekend it’s Jim.
Alex’s Dad: So, Frazier Woods, huh? I don’t know about you Guys, but it makes me a little nervous.
Valenti: Why? It’s a well-marked campsite.
Alex’s Dad: I mean about the sighting. Isn’t it close to where we’re going?
Valenti: Ah, it’s 3, maybe 4 miles. It’s nothing to worry about.
(Sheriff notices Max and Isabel are going on the trip)
Coach: Coleman. Daskal. Evans. Hausman.
Liz: He’s gonna find out. They’re going alphabetically, Maria.
Coach: Kalinowski. Parker.
Max: No, uh, expensive dinner?
Maria: Actually, there’s been a change in plans.
Maria: And we were making such progress.
Valenti: Yeah, it’s me. Tell Miller to put some extra men on the perimeter. I think something might happen tonight. I want to be ready.
(Everyone is looking for their own spot to set up a tent)
Phillip: Hey, hey. This looks like a good one.
Max: What about over there? It’s closer to the trees.
Phillip: Yeah. Good call.
Max: It’ll be easier to get away if we’re near the woods.
Isabel: This is crazy, Max. Valenti is right here.
Max: That’s exactly why we have to do this, Isabel. If that sighting is real and there is something out there, then we have to find it first. We have no choice.
Kyle: I’m gonna break the all-time record. Last year I ate 5 bratwurst. This year I’m gonna eat 6. How ’bout you? Dad….. Focus. Son.
Valenti: Sorry, Kyle. What were you asking?
Kyle: What is that? What are you doing?
Valenti: I promised Miller I’d stay in touch tonight. You know what? Reception’s low in this area. Let’s try a different site.
Kyle: But I picked this one.
Valenti: Kyle.
Kyle: I…
Alex’s Dad: Hey, look at us. We’re campin’.
Alex: Hey. Ok, here we go. Now we’re ready to have some fun.
(The Sheriff coincidentally gets good reception with his cell phone next to Max and Isabel’s campsite)
Valenti: Bingo. Reception. Hey, you got space for a few more around here?
(Mr. Parker, Liz, and Maria walk near Max and Isabel’s campsite)
Valenti: Jeff! Over here. Come on. We’ll make a party of it.
Liz & Maria: I don’t think that’s such a good idea.
Jeff: Look, there’s Alex. Come on, it’ll be fun. I can get to know some of your new friends.
(Kyle is telling a campfire story)
Kyle: That summer, they found 5 cows, all of them mutilated with surgical precision on Haddie Wexler’s farm. When she died 2 months later they did an autopsy, and sure enough, they found perfectly bored holes in her skull just where she claims the aliens made them when they abducted her that night. That skull is now buried deep somewhere within area 51.
Valenti: Got ’em on the edge of their seats, son. Where’d you hear that?
Kyle: It’s one of grandpa’s favorite ones, isn’t it?
Max: I’ll see your nickel and raise you a quarter.
Phillip: I fold. I know better.
Alex’s Dad: Ha. Too rich for my blood.
Jeff: What are you hidin’, Max? Got some power over these Guys…makes ’em do exactly what you want? Well, I call. Full house. Jacks and eights.
(Max’s hand would have beat Mr. Parker’s hand, but he changes one of the Aces to a 2 so Mr. Parker would win)
Max: 2 pair. You win.
Jeff: That was a good bluff. But I saw through you.
(Alex and Isabel are stargazing)
Isabel: And then to the right of the Milky Way, that’s Orion.
Alex: Oh, wow.
Isabel: And see the north star?
Alex: Yeah.
Isabel: Ok, now look a little to your left…and a little further out, that small group of stars right there, that’s the Cygnus constellation. It’s the furthest we can see from here.
Alex: It’s amazing.
Isabel: What is?
Alex: Staring at the stars with you. I mean, I used to look up there, and stars were just stars. One was just as good as the next one. Somehow with you…I mean… It’s so wondrous, you know? I mean…each star is…is a mystery, you know, and so full of possibility. This is so much better than seeing a movie.
Isabel: THanks.
Alex: Hey, listen, um…since we didn’t get a chance to go out on our date tonight, I was wondering if maybe you wanted to do something together on Friday.
Isabel: Our what?
Alex: Well, not a date. That’s probably the wrong word…
Isabel: I just thought that we were going to the movies, you know, to hang out, to have fun, talk like real friends….
Alex: Well, yeah, me, too…
Isabel: It can’t be a date, Alex. Don’t you understand? It can’t be anything like that.
(Isabel walks away)
(Max walks up to Liz as she is brushing her teeth)
Max: Always be prepared.
Liz: Well, contrary to what what some people might think, gambling is not a dental hygiene alternative.
Max: Liz, wait. Is this the way…things are gonna be between us from now on?
Liz: I think you were the one that wanted it this way.
Max: No, I didn’t. I wanted us…to slow down, not screech to a halt.
Liz: Well, then you should let me in, Max. You know, I know what’s going on. I’ve been…I have been waiting for you to be the one to bring it up, but you don’t. You’re here because of the sighting, Max.
Max: Please, no one else can know.
Liz: Max, I know you think…that we shouldn’t be together, and maybe you’re right. But you made me a part of this.
(River Dog goes to Michael’s trailer)
River Dog: It’s time.
(Liz goes back to her tent to find her dad going through her backpack)
Jeff: I thought you were washing up, sweetie.
Liz: I’m finished. What are you doing?
Jeff: I’m looking for these. Can you explain this?
Liz: Yeah, I can. Um…it’s echinacea, dad. You take it when you’re gonna get a cold. Why, what did you, uh, think?
Jeff: Nothing. It’s just that I…
Liz: You thought it was drugs.
Jeff: I didn’t know what to think. You’re so…grown up all of a sudden. I just feel like I’m not a part of your life anymore, that’s all.
Liz: I guess it’s just that whole privacy thing.
Jeff: Sure.
Voiceover: I guess everyone has their reasons for keeping people away, an instinct to protect yourself from getting hurt. It’s part of human nature. I just wish Max would understand that…that he would reaLize that he’s not that different from us at all. Maybe then we’d have a chance.
(Max and Isabel sneak off during the night and Liz follows them, as does Valenti after they get a bit of a head start)
Liz: You almost scared me to death.
Isabel: How do you think you made us feel?
Max: Go back right now.
Liz: Max, this matters to me, too.
Isabel: What matters is that we find out what this sighting is all about before anyone else can.
Liz: Don’t leave me out of this, Max…please.
Isabel: This is a mistake, Max. Getting everyone involved like this is just…
(Maria appears with a flashlight in hand)
Isabel: Oh, great. That’s great. Why don’t we just send out a flare?
Maria: I figured you Guys would be having a little woodsy tryst. I hope you’re here to talk them out of it, too.
Liz: Maria, they’re here because of the sighting.
Maria: That was real?
Max: That’s what we have to find out.
Isabel: Look, you can stand there explaining it to them all night. I’m going, ok?
Liz: Well, are you staying here or are you gonna come with?
Maria: You’re going with them?
Liz: Make up your mind, Maria. I’ve made up mine.
Maria: You can’t let go of him, can you?
Liz: I don’t want to.
Maria: Wait!
(Maria decides to follow)
Maria: Ok. We’ve been, like, hiking for over an hour.
Max: We’re getting close.
Maria: It is officially freezing out here.
Liz: Maria, it’s not that cold.
Maria: Really? Really, ’cause i’m now wearing an ice bra! Whatever, it’s uncomfortable!
(Dogs start barking off in the distance)
Liz: Is that coyotes?
Max: Search dogs. Come on, we’re close. Come on!
(Mr. Parker wakes up and looks around for Liz)
Jeff: Lizzie. Come inside, sweetie. It’s too cold. Liz, listen I’m sorry about before–
(Mr. Parker notices that Liz is gone)
Jeff: Oh, jeez…Liz?
Deputy: Come on, boys. You on to something? Come on!Let’s go! Let’s go!
Max: Can’t outrun them. They’re too fast.
Isabel: What are we gonna do?
Max: I don’t know.
Liz: You Guys just keep going.
Max: What?
Liz: Maria and I’ll stay here and just let them catch us.
Max: Liz, no.
Liz: No, Max, it’s all right. We’ll just say that we got lost in the woods. This is too important. Keep going.
Max: Are you sure?
Liz: Yeah. The important thing is you just find what you’re looking for.
Max: I will.
Liz: All right. Go. Isabel, go. Go!
Liz & Maria: We’re here! We’re over here! Help! Come find us! Help us! We’re over here! We’re here! We’re right here.
Maria: My mom’s gonna love this, really.
(River Dog and Michael are also searching through the woods)
River Dog: Just over there.
(River Dog falls and grimaces in pain)
Michael: Hey, are you all right?
River Dog: Gimme your hand.
Michael: Here.
River Dog: Whoa!
Michael: What, what, what, what, what?
River Dog: I…I think I broke my ankle. It’s…it’s about a mile north of here. You keep going. Ah…
Michael: Why don’t you fix it?
River Dog: What?
Michael: Your ankle.
River Dog: What are you talkin’ about?
Michael: Why don’t you tell me the truth?
River Dog: The truth about what?
Michael: About who you are.
River Dog: You think I’m Nasedo.
Michael: You knew everything about us. You knew what was wrong with me when I was sick, and you knew exactly how to fix it. How did you know all those things? And why would you wanna help us if you weren’t…
River Dog: I’m sorry, Michael…but I’m not your father.
Michael: Just had to make sure.
(Michael heals River Dog’s ankle)
Michael: You can walk now.
River Dog: THank you. Now we’re even.
Michael: I don’t think we’ll ever be even.
Michael: Better go. Let’s go.
(Liz and Maria meet up with Mr. Parker again)
Jeff: You two scared me to death.
Liz: Dad, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.
Maria: I am so sorry, Mr. Parker. I had to go to the bathroom, and I couldn’t handle the pit toilet, so I asked Liz to come with me, and next thing you know…
Jeff: It’s ok. I’m just so glad you Guys are all right.
Phillip: Officer, uh, you didn’t find anyone else?
Deputy: Only that Guy over there.
Milton: I’m a scientist!
Deputy: Found him wandering around the woods with a metal detector…looking for space ships.
Milton: You’re making a big mistake, friend! You’re all in grave danger!
Phillip: I’m missing my kids. Max and Isabel.
Deputy: No, sir. Sorry.
Max: We’re here. It’s the cave.
(Valenti is spying on Max and Isabel when Kyle sneaks up on him from behind)
Valenti: Kyle, what the hell are you doing here?
Kyle: Just wanted to see what was more important than me.
Valenti: You don’t understand.
Kyle: No, I don’t. I don’t understand why you’re hunting Max Evans, why you can’t just tell me.
(River Dog and Michael enter a small clearing and find Max and Isabel there as well)
River Dog: Wait, what are they doing here?
Michael: They came on their own.
River Dog: All right. This is where it’ll be.
Max: What are we looking for?
(Kyle and his father have a brief argument deep in the woods)
Valenti: Kyle, you get the hell outta here right now.
Kyle: How many times have I heard the stories, dad? How many times you sitting at home listening to grandma cry while grandpa spent the night chasing spacemen out in the woods? That’s my role now, isn’t it? It’s ironic.
Valenti: Kyle, wait.
Kyle: Now I know why you never wanted to see grandpa again. Because to him you were just a low priority!
Isabel: Oh, my God. It’s the symbol from the cave.
Michael: The white light, or whatever the hell that was, caused this?
River Dog: Yes. It’s a sign.
(Max, Isabel, Michael, and River Dog find an alien symbol burned onto the ground. They move toward it, turn off their flashlights, and hold out their palms to the symbol, causing it to light up with a light blue glow)
River Dog: It was meant for you.
Max: What does this mean?
Michael: That he’s back. Nasedo’s here.
Max: Someone’s here.
(The Sheriff enters the clearing)
Michael: What do you want?
Valenti: Step outta my way.
River Dog: Do as he asks.
(Max uses his power to make the alien symbol disappear while Michael is blocking the Sheriff)
Valenti: Something was here. What were you looking at?
Max: We’ve been lost for hours here. THank you for finding us.
(Max, Michael, and Isabel walk off)
(Sheriff Valenti is at a retirement home, gazing into a room filled with patients)
Doctor: Can I help you?
Valenti: Yeah. I’m here to see James Valenti, Sr.
Doctor: And you are?
Valenti: I’m his son.
Doctor: That’s him.
Valenti: Dad?
(We see Jim Valenti, Sr., an extremely weary-looking man who is having trouble eating some pears)
Valenti Senior: Damn pears are slippery.
Valenti: Dad. It’s me. It’s Jimmy. Been a while, huh?
Valenti Senior: A long time.
Valenti: Yeah. Maybe you were right. Maybe you were right all along. And I’m sorry. I can help you with those. Here.
(Scene fades out with Sheriff Valenti feeding his father at the retirement home)