#305 Control (2) – Quotes

Added by

Kal: How did you get to Los Angeles?
Max: I-10 west, then straight north.

Max: Do you murder everyone who discovers you’re an alien, or do they get a warning first?

Kal: So, this is the mighty king of Antar. A low-rent Tom Cruise with a $10 haircut?

Wedding Planner: Oh, there’s nothing more flammable than an old barn.
Isabel: Yes, well, that’s why we need the pond.

Isabel: You know weddings are full of all kinds of stupid traditions, like the garter toss and that–that chicken dance and, well… bridesmaids, and since you guys are the closest thing I have to girlfriends, I was wondering if you would be mine?

Max: See, our guy hunts down another alien, also stranded on earth. He’s the only person who can help him on his quest.
Man: How?
Max: I’m glad you asked, Scott. There’s a ship. And this other alien might know where it is, or at least have the resources to find it. You see, this other alien is a big… [Chuckles] Hollywood producer. [everyone- Chuckling and laughter] Kal: ah… that I like. Except I– I don’t like these feel-good science fiction flicks. I don’t think they’re interesting unless… Somebody dies.

Isabel: I’ve put a lot of thought into it, and I don’t see any reason why Jesse has to know the truth.
Michael: Well, knowing what I know about alien sex, he’s gonna have major questions after the honeymoon.

Maria: Open defiance of a parental unit. Whoo! This is just so twisted and… Romantic. You and max are totally Romeo and Juliet against the world.
Liz: Well, actually, Romeo never called last night.

Kal: Wait a minute, wait a minute. Are you giving me direction? I’m sorry, but how many academy awards have you won, huh? ‘Cause I’ve won four.

Mrs. Evans: Isabel, if you rush into this you’re gonna wake up someday, sweetheart, and you are gonna be a bitter, live-at-home 20-year-old divorcee. Is that what you want?
Isabel: Thanks for your support, Mom.

Kal: It’s in there.
Max: You can see through metal?
Kal: No. It’s the only building big enough to hold the ship.

Kal: Oh, I forgot to mention… You’ll need the key.
Max: Oh, I forgot to mention… I have it.

Liz: You know that I have been with him through all of this. All of it. Any time that he needs anything, I’m there. Right? And he can’t even pick up the phone.
Maria: Well, this phone that you speak of, it’s a revolutionary concept, yes, but it does work both ways.

Kal: I destroyed my life for you tonight, all for nothing. Because of you, everything I’ve worked for is gone. It’s how you’ve always been, your majesty: Selfish and ungrateful. Being your protector might be encoded in my genes, but after tonight… I’ll never stop hating you.

Quote of the Week:
Kal: Word of advice: the more you embrace your alien side, the more you’re gonna lose.