Roswell, NM citizens calling all aliens

I found this in the Seattle Post-Intellegencer and thought it was interesting.

Earth to aliens: It’s a new millennium, so give us a call

January 1, 2000
by Jim Moore

ROSWELL, N.M. — All cut from the same kooky cutter, the people arrived as UFO believers, gathering last night at the site of an old missile launcher to watch the world’s brightest laser show.

At midnight, beams of light danced against the starlit sky, stretching as high as 60,000 feet.

It was more than a spectacle. This is where a spaceship was said to have crashed in 1947, leading to a supposed governmental cover-up in what became known as “The Roswell Incident.”

In an attempt to re-establish contact with the aliens, one of the lasers carried more than 10,000 electronic greetings into outer space. The objective: to see if E.T. or anyone else was home.

By press time, the aliens had yet to click reply on their laptops. If they do, they will be embraced here.

A drive around town reveals an “Aliens Welcome” sign at Arby’s, a restaurant called “Outer Limits,” a party at the Best Western featuring a baby alien in a glassed-in cocoon, and a UFO museum.

“People ask me if I’ve seen any aliens,” said Gary Thomas, owner of Badger Construction. “I say: ‘Yeah, I like ’em. They taste just like chicken.'”

Most of the earthlings’ messages were warm and fuzzy, talking about hope and love and peace.

Others were more amusing.

“Hey Aliens! Git your hands off our wimmen,” wrote Todd, spelling-challenged in cyberspace.

“Yo homies,” wrote another. “Whussup?”

“Please bring chips and dip with you. I’ve got cookies in the oven for you when you arrive. Say hi to Chewbacca for me. Love you bunches,” from Ted.

“Hi out there! I don’t have a great life and I need a weird fun friend,” wrote a lonely soul.

Others wanted a spaceship delivered, preferably with the owner’s manual included. Some wanted to be beamed up, tired of life on this planet. One man is sick of dating human beings.

“Send me some alien babes,” he said.

The two men behind last night’s extravaganza were Charlie Waters, chief executive officer of the Roswell Chamber of Commerce, and Frank Costantini, co-owner of and lord of the lasers.

“We’re promoting Roswell and the biggest mystery of the millennium,” said Watters, who would otherwise be selling a charming farming community.

Costantini produced the show, which had a Seattle connection with music from Jimi Hendrix, more specifically from a cut called “And The Gods Made Life.”

“It’s so appropriate,” Costantini said. “Amazing stuff, so spacy.”

Picture taking a left turn off of Highway 26 anywhere between Royal City and Othello and you’ll get an idea of what last night’s site looked like.

The difference is that in Eastern Washington you will never see a 25-foot inflatable alien waving with his (hers? its?) three-fingered yellow hand to passers-by.

Like everything else, the alien was sponsored, wearing a sign from Roswell Toyota.

By 11 o’clock last night, the curious assembled at the corner of dysfunction junction and lunatic fringe, 20 miles west of town. Reporters were here from Time and Newsweek magazines and Fox News.

The lasers radiated from a 180-foot cavern where a missile was once poised for destruction overseas.

Theoretically, the light will travel endlessly, relaying messages to other life forms in the universe.

“We’re capturing a piece of immortality,” Costantini said.

“If they have the equipment to receive that, they will know the signals are intelligent. We’re hoping to find out.”